A meme of the TMI persuasion

Stolen from Erik who stole it from Alexander, I present a TMI. I promise it isn't terribly painful for those of you who go all ewww over straight sex.

“Adult Questions - Don’t Be a Pussy” meme. I’m not going to tag anyone on this, but feel free to steal it and provide your own answers.

1. Is there anyone on your blogroll you would have sex with?
That I can neither confirm nor deny. I think a more pertinent question is would anyone on my blog roll have sex with me?

2. Sex in the morning, afternoon or night? Yes!

3. Have you ever had to pull over on the side of the road to puke?
Not that I recall

4. Have you ever taken your clothes off for money?
No

5. Shower or bath while having sex?
Haven't, but would consider doing it in the shower.

6. Do you want someone aggressive or passive in bed?
Yes

7. Do you love someone on your blogroll?
In the larger sense of love, yes, quite a few. In the more intimate sense, no.

8. Love or Money?
Love, definitely

9. Credit cards or cash?
Debit and my PIN

10. Have you ever wanted a best friend?
Yes

11. Camping or a 5 star hotel? It depends on my mood and my stress level and whether I plan to have lots of sex. The hotel for sex. Those beds are much more comfortable and the linens are provided and laundered.

12. Where is the weirdest place you have had sex?
Probably in the cemetary.

13. Would you shave your entire body (including your head)?
No

14. Have you ever been to a strip club?
No

15. Ever been to a bar?
Yes

16. Ever been kicked out of a bar or a club?
No

17. Ever been so drunk someone else had to carry you?
No

18. Had sex in a movie theater?
No

19. Had sex in a bathroom?
Oh, that was a good one!

20. Have you ever had sex at work?
No, but wanted to.

21. Ever been to an adult store?
Yes

22. Bought something from an adult store?
Yes

23. Have you been caught having sex ?
By my children!!

24. Does anyone have naughty pics of you?
Define naughty.

25. Ever had sex with someone and called them by the wrong name? No

gone but not gone and back again

I read a book. A good book. A very good book. You should read it, too.

That's where I've been for the last day or two. Enmeshed in How Long Has This Been Going On? It's a novel, and a compelling set of stories at that. 

When I get swept up in a good story, or an adventure, or a personal crisis, or whatever captures my attention I tend to focus on it. This is one of those books that pulled me in and didn't let me go. I hardly slept, barely ate, and didn't bathe the whole time I read the thing. That shower last night felt really good! :) Maybe it isn't so good to hyper-focus on stuff like that. Other things get neglected. I have that kind of passion. But I'm done with the book now and ready for some of life again. 

Right before I started How Long... I read a history of the Stonewall riots. It also was a very good book, but not nearly as compelling a read as the novel. It took me nearly a month to get through that one, just because I kept coming over here to blog and stuff. My point, though, is that it's good to read up on the social sea change of the 60s era to get a good perspective of what the culture was like for gays in the mid 20th century compared to what it's like today. The novel How Long... covers that time span. I feel as though I had a good background knowledge to appreciate the novel. I have been wanting to read up on Stonewall anyhow, since I really didn't know too much about it. 

Now I'm ready to get to the next book in my HUGE stack of books I want to read. :)

No! It'll never pass!

I know it's cliche, but I really like The Birdcage. When I'm having one of my dark depressive episodes, C and I play out this scene as Albert and Agadore.

Java: C, I'm in such pain!

C: I know honey, it's gonna pass.

Java: No! It'll never pass!

And when I'm in the middle of it, it seems as though it will never pass, that I will always be in this tar pit. 

But guess what? It passes! Yes, I do feel better. Friday and Saturday were bad. Yesterday I didn't do much at all. Today I feel much better. The children are in school now. I hope I can maintain this level of sanity once they get home.

I mentioned a couple of posts ago that our van had broken down. Yesterday Superman and I went out to where it was abandoned on the side of the highway to try to start it up again. No go. So we called AAA. I've been a memeber of AAA since 1984. Since we have almost always had old clunker vehicles, AAA has been a very good investment for us. We had the van towed to the shop. The whole ordeal was rather pleasant, actually. Superman and I sat in the pick-up, talking and teasing each other while we waited for the tow truck. It was a bright and breezy day, warm in the sun with a cool wind. It was fun spending time with my husband.

So the van is in the shop. I'm afraid to hear from the mechanic. But I'm not going to worry about it now.

The darkness lifts, I can see hope and possibilities and even a bit of happiness again. This won't last, either. I'll fall into despair again. But it's all temporary. If I can keep this perspective as I work to develope healthier attitudes I can continue to function. It's all good.

Light and Fluffy

Since it is a quiz specifically for men I suppose my results don't really mean anything. OK, since it is a meaningless quiz I suppose my results don't mean anything. But it's fun. :)

Stolen unabashedly from Patrick.

You Are 35% Stereotypically Gay

 

You definitely have some stereotypically gay traits. You might set off a person's gaydar now and then. If you are not actually gay, you could be mistaken for gay from time to time. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

How Stereotypically Gay Are You?
Take More Quizzes

Disconnect

It has been a difficult weekend. Diva and Sproing have been busy exhibiting the worst in pre-adolescent behavior. I am crazy again.

If you've been paying close attention for a while, you may notice that occasionally my sanity quits working. It usually lasts 3-7 days. I strongly suspect hormones. And most will agree that there is a decent amount of stress in my life. Well, I seem to be going through another episode of insanity. 

Not able to concentrate well

Crying a lot

Sleeping a lot and then not sleeping for long stretches

Not able to form coherent sentences

Stuttering 

Getting inordinately angry, especially at the children

That's been my weekend, interspersed with bursts of creativity and deep philosophical thought. The background drone through all this is heavy despair from the omnipresence of evil in the world, and its effect on the innocents. 

There is a long list of mundane disturbances to my peace, but most of them I've mentioned before. The only really new thing is that tonight the van broke down when Superman was on his way home from taking Light back to school. Thankfully he was almost to our county when the van died. It's on the side of the highway about 1 or 1.5 miles on the other side of the lake. So that's another thing we get to deal with tomorrow. Otherwise I don't want to talk about it. 

And now I'm going back to bed. Maybe tomorrow I will be more sane. 

Know thine enemy

I'm trying not to get political on the blog here, mainly because it is not an area in which I feel very comfortable. However, today I got an email from a very conservative "Christian" friend. The other day she sent me an email, something about how wonderful Sarah Palin is. I have resisted responding to anything she sends me in hopes of discouranging her from sending that crap. But that one pushed me too far so I replied. I simply said that Palin scares me and I am not going to vote for the McCain/Palin ticket. 

My inbox this morning contained the following.

I heard what you said about Palin, and you maybe right but any vote that is not for them is a vote for Obama.  And a vote for Obama is a vote for the Anti-Christ to be ushered in.  Just the thought of that scares me because I know what the word of God says concerning what will happen when he does.  And if I can vote against it, and pray that God has Mercy on us for 4 more years I will. I will agree that Im not sure McCain and Palin are the best choice as it is made to appear.  But I do fear what the other choice represents.

I pray that God leads you in your choice for this presidency.

In His Love

(X)

Yes, dear, I will be voting for Obama. Besides which, Treasury Secretary Paulson is the Antichirst. Have you not recognized him?

No, I'm not going to reply to this email. At this point there is nothing either of us can say to the other that will be effective. Otherwise I'm invoking Thumper's rule.*

*first 30 seconds or so of the clip

Frivolity

Thanks to Monkey and Light for the idea.

Your result for The Nerd? Geek? or Dork? Test...

Tri-Lamb Material

For The Record:

A Nerd is someone who is passionate about learning/being smart/academia.

A Geek is someone who is passionate about some particular area or subject, often an obscure or difficult one.

A Dork is someone who has difficulty with common social expectations/interactions.

You scored better than half in Nerd and Dork, earning you the coveted title of: Tri-Lamb Material.

The classic, "80's" nerd, you are what most people think of when they think "nerd," largely due to 80's movies like Revenge of the Nerds and TV shows like Head of the Class. You're exceptionally bright and smart, and partly because of that have never quite fit in with your peers or social groups. Perhaps you've realized, or will someday, that it is possible to retain all of the things that you like about being brilliant and still make peace with the social cliques around you. Or maybe you won't--it's really not necessary. As the brothers of Lambda Lambda Lambda discovered, you're fine just the way you are and can take pride in that. I mean, who wants to be like Ogre, right!?

Congratulations!

Thanks Again! -- THE NERD? GEEK? OR DORK? TEST

Take The Nerd? Geek? or Dork? Test at HelloQuizzy

On a somewhat ironic note, I've never seen that movie.

I just had a thought that led to a question (not atypical for me)

Why is a Prince Albert called a Prince Albert? Does it have anything to do with Prince Albert?

I identify maybe too closely

Have I ever shown you an xkcd comic here? I may have. Sometimes they are really good. 

Superman showed me this one today.

If you go to the xkcd site (the first link) I recommend you click the "random" link. I recommend doing this when there aren't any other urgent tasks you need to accomplish.

We'll always have Paris

From Stephen's example

Your result for Are You a Jackie or a Marilyn? Or Someone Else? Mad Men-era Female Icon Quiz...

You Are an Ingrid!

You are an Ingrid -- "I am unique"

Ingrids have sensitive feelings and are warm and perceptive.

How to Get Along with Me

• * Give me plenty of compliments. They mean a lot to me.


• * Be a supportive friend or partner. Help me to learn to love and value myself.


• * Respect me for my special gifts of intuition and vision.


• * Though I don't always want to be cheered up when I'm feeling melancholy, I sometimes like to have someone lighten me up a little.


• * Don't tell me I'm too sensitive or that I'm overreacting!

What I Like About Being an Ingrid

• * my ability to find meaning in life and to experience feeling at a deep level


• * my ability to establish warm connections with people


• * admiring what is noble, truthful, and beautiful in life


• * my creativity, intuition, and sense of humor


• * being unique and being seen as unique by others


• * having aesthetic sensibilities


• * being able to easily pick up the feelings of people around me

What's Hard About Being an Ingrid

• * experiencing dark moods of emptiness and despair


• * feelings of self-hatred and shame; believing I don't deserve to be loved


• * feeling guilty when I disappoint people


• * feeling hurt or attacked when someone misundertands me


• * expecting too much from myself and life


• * fearing being abandoned


• * obsessing over resentments


• * longing for what I don't have

Ingrids as Children Often

• * have active imaginations: play creatively alone or organize playmates in original games


• * are very sensitive


• * feel that they don't fit in


• * believe they are missing something that other people have


• * attach themselves to idealized teachers, heroes, artists, etc.


• * become antiauthoritarian or rebellious when criticized or not understood


• * feel lonely or abandoned (perhaps as a result of a death or their parents' divorce)

Ingrids as Parents

• * help their children become who they really are


• * support their children's creativity and originality


• * are good at helping their children get in touch with their feelings


• * are sometimes overly critical or overly protective


• * are usually very good with children if not too self-absorbed

Take Are You a Jackie or a Marilyn? Or Someone Else? Mad Men-era Female Icon Quiz at HelloQuizzy

Remind me again why I had children

Diva and Sproing returned unscathed from their field trip. I told you about the plan, right? The adventure is called "Sleeping with the Sharks" and the kids camped out in the tunnels that run under the large shark tank. If it weren't for all those kids there, I think I'd like that. Can you imagine lying in bed looking up at a tank full of sharks and assorted other sea life? Cool. Anyway, neither of my young'uns was thrown to the sharks, so I qualify that as a success. 

However, all is not rosy in kidlet land. 

Do you remember just a couple of days ago when I did all those good mommy things to get the kidlets ready for their field trip? For ready reference, I include the pertinent facts from my previous post:

In addition to washing Sproing's clothes on a special extra trip to the laundromat, I got all kinds of goodies for their trip. I filled up a bag for each of them with a disposable 35mm camera, a book of games and puzzles to do on the 5 hour bus trip, snacks for the bus trip, a white t-shirt for the art project they are supposed to do during this educational experience, mechanical pencils (that don't need sharpening) to use on their puzzle books, and money (cold hard cash!!) for tonight's dinner and the gift shops. 

Sproing at least was very excited about the bag of goodies. I don't specifically remember Diva's response. I thought it was a pretty nifty collection. For whatever reason Diva felt the need for more. Maybe she wanted something more high tech than a book of puzzles. Maybe she thinks other people will like her better if she has better stuff to show off. With her there's no telling. 

She stole my digital camera. 

If she had asked to borrow it I would have said "no." So she didn't ask. I discovered it Friday evening on a bookshelf in my room, nowhere near its usual location. I thought that was odd. I didn't have reason to use the camera while they were gone, so I didn't miss it. When I saw it on the shelf I suspected it had been borrowed. So I searched the memory. It was completely empty. No images saved on the memory card or the internal memory. I had emptied the memory card a couple of days ago when I downloaded that beautiful picture of Gregory. :)

My suspicions were confirmed by Sproing. He volunteered that Diva had taken my camera. And he pointed out that she had deleted all the images she photographed. Ok, I'm impressed/pleased that she was at least smart enough to do that. How sad is it that I realize her cognitive improvements by how well she hides her crimes? 

This evening I confronted her about the camera. I asked if she had taken it on the trip. "No." I asked her again, giving her the evil eye. (It didn't work. Used to work on Light and usually on Twitch. They had healthy consciences.) She was a bit hesitant in her negative answer and didn't look me in the eye. Um-hm. So I asked her a third time, and said "Say 'yes.'" She gave me that sorrowful pouty look and whined "y-y-yes." Did I not provide a camera for you? Did I buy all sorts of things for you to take on the trip, and for that matter pay good money to let you go? She reluctantly confirms. I walked out of the room. I figure that was a better choice than what I really wanted to do, which involved smacking her pout from her face to her toes. 

This isn't finished. There will be consequences. Our challenge, however, is to come up with meaningful and enforceable consequences. Any ideas? Superman and I are once again flummoxed. Any suggestions are welcome and will be considered. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In other news, my wireless internet connection is screwy. I was boogieing along this afternoon, emailing interesting missives back and forth to various buddies, when suddenly I noticed I wasn't connected to the in'erwebz. "Honey? I need your help..." Just one of the many reasons I call him Superman. We tried various things. I restarted the 'puter. He reset the router. Then the modem. Then the entire desktop system. (it's a dinosaur) Nuthin'. So I shut down and took a nap in hopes that all my problems would be solved when I woke up. Also I was sleepy. Alas, when I awoke 2 hours later I still had no internet. 

This is really bad timing. There is some really interesting juicy stuff going on with friends, none of which I'm going to tell you so don't even ask. That's beside the point. I was emailing hot and heavy here, and suddenly... nada. ARGH! My beloved Superman spent a couple of hours on the phone with tech support figuring out that the problem is not in the wireless router, but must be in the internal wireless card in my laptop. That's the way I understand it, anyhow. I frown and nod. Right now I'm wired to the router. Stuck here beside the big box in the living room, not in my comfy nest where I belong. I am thankful for the connection, though. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

As I mentioned a few days ago, Diva and Sproing played their final soccer game of the regular season on Wednesday. Today was the first day of playoffs. Superman took them way out to the next town down the pike where playoffs are held. During playoffs they charge admission for everyone except players and coaches, so Superman had to pay $3 for the privilege of watching his kids play soccer. Tournament play in this league is single elimination. The kids' team lost their game this afternoon (Yippee!! ) so the season is now officially over. *sigh of relief* (don't hate)

There might have been something else I was going to say. I decided not to tell you about the gawd-awful mess that C and S left in my kitchen for TWO DAYS before finally cleaning it up late last night. Yesterday was wet and drippy and cool. Today's temperatures have been blessedly autumnal. My friend R from California has been sending me incredibly sappy "Christian" messages ever since I got back online. Another one just popped up in my inbox. Besides that and a few other even less meaningful trivialities, I have nothing else to say except goodnight. 

Goodnight

Busy days

I finally got my chance to hear Gregory sing! * He recently joined the ensemble group Chanticleer and has been on tour with the group for the past 2.5 weeks. Tuesday was the last concert in the tour, and was at the Newberry Opera House. Newberry is a small town along Interstate 26 between Greenville and Columbia, South Carolina. Their claim to fame is the Opera House. It's about 40 miles east of here. I hadn't been before Tuesday. It's a nice little place, the town and the venue. But that's not the important thing. No, the important thing is that I got to see Gregory! And hear him sing! I have tried but failed to see Gregory a couple of times this past summer. Here we are in the lobby after the performance. He looks great. I look big. Never mind. 

He is one more blogger friend I have now met. I so enjoy meeting my blog buddies. Gregory has a personality as big as all outdoors and it shows in his writing (to which I cannot link. Sorry if that frustrates you. Trust me, dears, he is fabulous!) When we met Tuesday afternoon it did not seem like a first meeting. I felt like I was having lunch with an old friend, which I guess I really was. The transition from reading his blog to exchanging email and text messages, to giving him a great big hug was smooth as silk. 

Superman and I got to Newberry around 3 in the afternoon on Tuesday. Gregory was just chillin' at the hotel, so we met him there. We took a walk down Main St. to a local eatery where Superman and I had late lunch/early dinner. We sat in a booth there in the restaurant talking and laughing for a couple of hours before Gregory had to go to rehearsals. It was so much fun! 

Superman and I hung around, walked around downtown Newberry, chilled in the lobby of the hotel (which is right across the street from the Opera House) until time to go to the show. The show, let me just say, was fantastic. If you ever get a chance to hear Chanticleer, take it! They'll be at the Met in early December for 4 shows. There's a concert calendar on the Chanticleer website. 

'Twas rather late when we returned home Tuesday night. I was so pumped that I had a hard time getting to sleep. And Wednesday I had to get up early and do Good Mommy things.

I woke up Wednesday morning at 7:00. I rolled out of bed, took my meds and used the bathroom, slipped on my shoes, grabbed my purse and was out the door. I took all the kids to school and Superman to work. I went from there to Wal-Mart where I bought stuff that Diva and Sproing need for the field trip they are on now. [Field trip aside: The 5th grade classes at the kids' school go on an overnight field trip every year to Myrtle Beach, where they "sleep with the sharks" at the Ripley Museum thing over there. They sleep in the walkways that run under the big shark tank. It's a big deal. Diva and Sproing have been looking forward to it for months. They left this morning (Thursday) and will be back at the school tomorrow at noon. It's very peaceful at home this evening. :)]  After checking out at Wal-Mart and getting the cash I'd need to give the kids for their trip, I took my tired old self to the laundromat. Superman and Twitch had put a few loads of our dirty laundry into the van before we left home. 

Wait, there is an addendum to this series of events. After I left the store I had to get some food and coffee. I stopped at the IHOP for a good breakfast (pumpkin pancakes at the IHOP this month y'all. Go. Eat. Enjoy) and coffee. My waiter was a fabulous little cocoa fruit cup with huge "diamond" earrings. I called him "dear" and "honey" and smiled so sweetly at him and gave him a big tip. It was a wonderful breakfast all around. 

OK, so now off to the laundromat, my favorite place in town. (cough, hack, gag) There are so many dirty clothes, towels, sheets, etc. etc. Way too many for me to deal with all at once. Sproing wanted something specific to wear on the field trip which of course was dirty, and requested specifically that it get washed. So I told him to put it in the hamper that Twitch was loading into the van. They loaded towels (we have an amazing quantity of towels, even considering the size of the household) and jeans and Superman's work pants. Heavy stuff that is very difficult to wash by hand. 

I only took 3 hampers, one of which was half full. It made 5 loads in the washers at the laundromat. I can handle that. It isn't overwhelming. I ponied up the cash for the dryers, too. It took an hour and a half, I think, and I got everything washed, dried and folded. It was so exciting. The clean stuff is still neatly folded in the hampers right here beside my bed. Follow through is a problem in our home. 

I got back home sometime between 11:00 and noon and was hot, dirty, tired, and my head itched. I got a shower and shampoo then went through my email for a little while. I napped for less than an hour, then it was time to hit it again. I picked up Twitch from school, wasted an hour doing I have no idea what, then took Sproing and Diva to their soccer game. Superman and Twitch went to gather a load of firewood from a source we'd discovered. (fallen trees, not nicely chopped and split cords of wood). 

Last night's soccer game was the last of the season, so we had the awards "banquet" afterwards. The team met at the local Pizza Inn for the buffet and awarding of the trophies. It was ... an experience. Similar to other soccer award banquets I've been to. And that I don't want to repeat. And that I didn't want to do last night.  It's another one of those good mommy things, you know? The kidlets had a blast, and it's over, so we smile and soldier on. 

Once we got home and the kids were preparing for bed we realized that the clothes Sproing wanted for his field trip did not in fact make it to the laundry basket in the van. I wondered, because of what I washed yesterday morning the only thing he had in the load was a couple pair of underwear and some socks. So at 8:45 last night I took another load of the kids' clothes and lugged my tired ass back to the laundromat. It was anticlimactic. 

I did however feel very "good mommy" yesterday. In addition to washing Sproing's clothes on a special extra trip to the laundromat, I got all kinds of goodies for their trip. I filled up a bag for each of them with a disposable 35mm camera, a book of games and puzzles to do on the 5 hour bus trip, snacks for the bus trip, a white t-shirt for the art project they are supposed to do during this educational experience, mechanical pencils (that don't need sharpening) to use on their puzzle books, and money (cold hard cash!!) for tonight's dinner and the gift shops. 

By the time I got to bed last night I was exhausted. Unfortunately I had Coke with my pizza at the pizza buffet. Coke, you know the stuff with caffeine? Bad idea. I was very tired but couldn't go to sleep. As I lay in bed wishing I could sleep the pizza came up and bit me in the esophagus. Acid reflux. Ick. I had to get up and stay vertical for an hour or so. I piddled around on the computer, mainly read my email, for that time. I was too sleepy and weird to write anything coherent, which is why I'm posting this entry tonight rather than last night. I finally was able to lie down and go to sleep about 1:30 this morning. Superman, the dear that he is, took all the kids to school this morning. When I woke up and looked at the clock I was shocked to see it was 11:55! Yay! I slept almost 11 hours! I needed it. My muscles are sore from all the walking around we did in Newberry on Tuesday and shopping, laundry, and going to the soccer game yesterday.

It's 8:00 now. I'm tired (still or again, I'm not sure which). Sproing and Diva aren't here, so it's relatively peaceful. Superman is going to take me out to dinner soon. We'll bring back something for Twitch. 

Tomorrow I see my therapist. Visits to her office usually do me a lot of good, help give me perspective, and encourage me. I should take the next category of laundry to the "wash-ateria" as my Grandmama used to call it. Don't know yet whether I'll have the gumption for that little adventure. The kidlets will be home after school tomorrow, and I'm sure I'll be bombarded by excited and very tired younguns. But right now I'm going out to eat with my sweetie. 

*I would link to his blog, except he has deleted it since he is now such a public figure.

the great TP debate

Eric over at Gambrinous with Griffonage had a post on this topic recently. I'm amazed at how big an issue this is. 

This is how Superman and I handle the debate. Though it may not be obvious in this photo, there are also two different brands of TP. This is one of the ways our marriage has lasted as long as it has. 

We also have two different tubes of toothpaste. Though we sleep in the same bed, we each have our separate covers. 

Creative solutions, people.

PocketMods

I want to share a discovery I made recently. Pocket mods are a nifty low-tech alternative to high tech, high end organizers. 

From the website:

What makes the PocketMod so special?

Many things make this little personal organizer special, here is a list.

1. It fits easily in your back pocket or purse.
2. It's as cheap as one piece of paper (Because that's all it is!)
3. It opens like a book. Leading to easier to find, more organized notes.
4. The first page has a pouch, big enough to carry a business card!
5. Customizable with "Mods" tailored to your needs.
6. It's free and fun!                  

I first used the pocket mod a few times maybe a year ago, but went back to it a couple of weeks ago and found that they've made some improvements to the application. Some of the page options can be personalized, so you can print out your contact information, for instance. They've got game options on it, too. I like to print the sudoku puzzles. They also have tic-tac-toe blanks which would be good to use for kids to keep them occupied. 

I think it's a nifty idea, and I like the low tech, low cost aspect of it. If I lose one, who cares? I'll just print out a new one.

(Why is my formatting all messed up? I tried to fix it on the meme post I did last week and it wouldn't work. I'm all grrumph about it.)

NCOD

It's a little late in the day, I suppose, but when is it too late to make a statement about coming out?

As I mentioned to someone this week, I'm a huge proponent of coming out. Recently there have been some high profile coming out events. My most recent favorite is Father Geoffrey Farrow of Fresno, CA, the Catholic priest who basically came out to his congregation during the worship service last Sunday. That took some serious testicular fortitude.

When there are high profile instances of coming out, does that make it easier for the average Joe Blow or Jane Doe to come out to his or her family, friends, coworkers? I guess it depends on all sorts of situational variables. 

Anyway, on this National Coming Out Day 2008, this is my statement:

I am not gay. However, I support those who are homosexual or transgender. I encourage the acceptance of homosexuality as a normal and natural variation of the human condition. I support actions, events, legislation, institutions that lead to equal civil rights to homosexuals and the transgendered. 

And I think I've mentioned here before that my goal in life is to end homophobia in the western world. I intend to get as close as I can to that goal.

Meme time!

20 question meme

The rules of the game:

RULE #1 : the "duh" stuff

RULE #2 : didn't like it so I'm not including it.

RULE #3 : When the meme is on my blog, I make the rules.

1. If your lover betrayed you, what will your reaction be?

There would be a lot of crying and gnashing of teeth, self loathing and him-loathing.

A nervous breakdown isn't outside the realm of the possible.

2. If you have a dream you’d like to come true, what is it?

I want a graduate degree. I want to go to grad school and learn stuff and have a really good time and maybe get some direction for what to do with the rest of my life.

Oh, and I'd like the elimination of homophobia from the western world, on the rocks, please.(We'll tackle the mid-east and Asia in the next volley.)

3. Whose butt would you like to kick?
I'm not a vengeful person. I can't think of anyone I know personally who I think really needs a butt whoopin'. And I'm not touching politics these days. But if I had the chance, I would definitely see to it that Indigo's monster of a father got the torture he so desperately needs.

4. What would you do with a billion dollars?

Have you noticed how a million isn't really enough to play with anymore? This kind of question now uses amounts much higher than a million dollars.

Were I to come into possession of that much money I would pay the taxes first. Don't want any trouble with the G-men. I would have all sorts of hawt handy men come into my house and renovate it, then I'd sell it. I would probably get a good chunk of land somewhere relatively remote and have a house built for me and my family. House our houses. Perhaps a compound of some kind.

Wouldn't that be fun? We could go all David Lee Roth on everybody's asses. Wait, not David Lee Roth. Um, David... Indian... Davidian! That's it.

I would invest some of the money, at this point I'd probably go with real estate and gold and other precious metals. As Scarlett's Daddy, the great Gerald O'Hara said, "Why, land is the only thing in the world worth workin' for, worth fightin' for, worth dyin' for, because it's the only thing that lasts. ."

But I'd probably end up giving most of it away to charities and causes I hold dear.

5. Will your best friend always be your best friend?

Well, not knowing, I cannot say.

6. Have you ever been in love with two people at once?

Yes.

7. How long would you wait for someone you really loved?

Wait? Wait for what? I'll wait for Superman to fix the washing machine. I'll wait for him to get home from work. I have been waiting for him in one sense or another for years now.

8. If you won the lottery, would you quit your job?

Seeing as I don't currently have a job, I think this question doesn't apply. If one were to consider my job to be that of wife and mother, then no I would not quit that job. However, I might rearrange things a bit. For instance, I dream about putting Sproing and Diva in boarding school for 9 months out of the year and traveling around the country with Superman and a camper trailer. That's my dream on the bad days, anyway.

9. Who is on your celebrity top 5…you know, the ones…that if you ever had an opportunity…

This is more of a guy question, I think. The interpersonal relationship between me and the one ... if I ever had an opportunity... is a significant part of the opportunity (or possibility). That being said, considering this from a guy perspective, I'd say:

Patrick Dempsey
Johnny Depp Timothy OlyphantBrendan Fraser

(I couldn't pick just one)

Ty Pennington

10. What sucks the life out of you?

When my children steal from me and lie to me.

11. How would you see yourself in ten years time?

Living somewhere besides South Carolina, with a master's degree, and possibly working in a glbt community center or something. My darling children would be out of my home, healthy and independent in their own lives.

12. What’s your greatest fear/phobia?

I'm not sure which I fear more, failure or success.

13. What kind of person do you think the person who tagged you is?

Since I wasn't exactly tagged I'm not sure how to answer this question. I first read the meme at Heterosexually Challenged, which is a lovely blog with great photography (perfectly safe for work) written by a friendly gentleman from the Chicago area. On a non-related note, I think the person who wrote this question has very poor writing skills.

14. Would you rather be single and rich or married but poor?

I'm already married but poor. It's frustrating at times, but I generally like it.

There are different concepts of "poor," however. As for liquid assets, they are very few. Solid assets aren't doing too well either. However, I have the love of a Super man, children who claim to love me (some of them show it) and a large cadre of friends all over North America and beyond who support me even when I get too whiny.

15. What’s the first thing you do when you wake up?

Recently I've been waking up very suddenly. I'm not startled, don't have a bad dream that shakes me or anything. I'm just awake! I like to wake up slowly, becoming aware of my fingers and toes by degrees. These days that ain't happening. I still try to lie in the bed for a few minutes when I can.

16. Would you give all in a relationship?

I think that's pretty much what I do.

17. Is your career vitally important to you?

I'll let you know if and when I get one.

18. Would you forgive and forget no matter how horrible a thing someone has done?

That would depend on many different factors. By my nature I am a forgiving person, though.

19. Do you prefer being single or having a relationship?

I haven't been single in so long I wouldn't know what to do with myself. The relationship I'm currently in is a very good one, I like it here, I'm used to the scenery.

20. List 6 people to tag:

See Rule #3 above. Do it if you want, or don't. Either way I'm happy.

More about the laundry

I had no idea laundry could be so challenging. There are so many uncertainties involved with washing up a few things in the bathtub. How much laundry goes into the tub at once? How much water does it need? Do I fill the water until it completely covers all the laundry, or just until everything is wet? How much laundry detergent do I add? And when? Before the clothes go in or after? Should I use cold or warm water? Hot is just too hot for me, because I have to get my hands in there, too. Ick. 

Making decisions about all those questions just leads to more questions. The clothes are in the tub with water and detergent. How much agitation do they need? Can I just let them

soak? For how long? I could get in the tub and stomp on the clothes if I make sure my feet are clean first. I also have a broom handle to push the stuff around. Which method is better for agitating the clothes?

As you can see from this picture we are certainly releasing some dirt from these clothes. The water was actually darker than it appears here. I tried a couple of times to get a more accurate depiction of the color of the water, but this is as good as I could do. Nasty, isn't it?

So here these clothes are sitting in a tub of dirty water. Now what? I drain the water, but I'm sure there's still lots of that dirty water left in the clothes. I need to rinse them. But how? I could turn the shower on and let the water soak through everything, if it would. Or should I fill up the tub again? And how do I know if I got the clothes clean enough?

Do you remember the old TV commercial for some washing detergent, the one where they ask the question "How do you know if a brown towel is clean?" The answer, as we discover in the ad, is to smell it. So I picked up one of the formerly smelly articles and smelled it again. Nope, not so formerly smelly. Still presently smelly. So I added a little more detergent, a little more water, and swished it around again. I did this in part to delay rinsing. I had no idea how to rinse this tub full of soapy clothes. 

By this time I had washed my feet so I could step on the pile of laundry. I got into the tub, turned on the water and kicked the clothes around for a while. The water was still dirty, though not as bad as before. Then I figured I'd unstop the drain and let the shower rain clean water over everything. But the stuff probably needed more agitating, don't you think? If I turn on the shower, how am I going to move the clothes around without getting wet?

This whole broken washing machine experience has me "thinking outside the box" anyway so it was a natural progression to wonder why not get wet? Hmm. My last shower was... yesterday? Maybe the night before? I lifted my arm and sniffed the pit. OOohhhh!! Last shower was too long ago! So I made sure I had a clean dry towel, stripped down to my birthday suit, and got into the tub. I didn't want to get bath soap into the clothes, too, so I kicked them to the back of the tub and had myself a lovely little shower. After I was rinsed the clothes came back to the front of the tub and I stomped and squished and kicked them all around. Washing clothes in the bathtub isn't so bad if a) you get to do it in the nude (I thought of you Sage) and b) you get to blog about it.

One of the things I did wrong with this first load was to put a thick tapestry woven cotton throw in with the clothes and sheets. That sucker, when wet, was incredibly heavy! That's the piece I used for my sniff test. It had been quite odiferous before washing. I actually pulled that to the front of the tub for some individual washing attention. But when that thing was in with the rest of the laundry the whole mess was very difficult to agitate. I got the throw washed and rinsed all by itself, then tried to wring it out. Oh, my aching back! It was too heavy for me to lift in the first place, the bathtub is at an awkward level to do this kind of work, and I'm not particularly strong. That damned throw had me huffing and straining and just about did me in. I got as much water out of it as I could, then carried it to the master bathroom and dumped in on the floor of our shower.* This definitely was a job for Superman! When he picked the thing up later, after it had drained in the shower stall for half a day, he estimated it weighed 50 lbs. I think it was probably closer to 25 lbs, but it's all too heavy for me.  I had to lie down and rest just to catch my breath after wrestling with that thing. 

Once my respiration and heart rate returned to normal I went back to deal with the tub full of now clean but very wet laundry. I stomped on it for a few minutes to squish some of the water out. I then decided that it would be advantageous for the load to stay in the tub for a while so it would drain more on its own. That was my justification, anyway. And what do you know, I didn't get back to it before Superman got home! You know why I call him Superman don't you? Yes, he wrung everything out and put it in the dryer.

We had that adventure on Monday. Tuesday I knew there were still things to wash so I had Diva gather all her dirty stuff and put it in the bathroom. After they left for school I dumped the contents of her basket into the tub, being careful to remove anything very thick or heavy that would pose a threat to my now quite sore back. I filled the tub with warm water and a quantity of detergent, then used the broom handle to swish it around. Which made my back hurt pretty bad. So I decided (I love how my brain processes these things) that the best way to wash this load was to let it soak for a while to loosen up all that dirt. Lo and behold, it took ALL DAY for that load to soak! I swished it around a time or two as I passed the bathroom on my way to the kitchen. I had each of the younger ones give it a stir when they got home. Poor ol' overworked Superman ended up rinsing and wringing the load after supper that night. I genuinely feel guilty for leaving so much of it for him to do, but honestly it overwhelmed me to the point that I couldn't deal.

I learned from my mistake on Monday to not put the thick heavy stuff in the tub. So on Tuesday I got to make brand new mistakes. He told me I had way too many clothes in the tub at one time. Now listen, y'all. It's a really big bath tub! Well, about standard sized for a bathtub but really big for a wash tub. So I put a really big load of laundry in it. He also tells me I added too much water. Oops. Sorry. So Wednesday I learned from the mistakes of Monday and Tuesday and didn't do any laundry at all!!!!  

The replacement part for the washing machine was delivered Tuesday afternoon. Superman mentioned he might take the front of the washing machine off and see if he could fix it. He asked me if I thought he should or not. I told him "It doesn't matter to me whether you do or don't. I trust you to decide if you think you can do it. But if you do, I'll take pictures and post them on the internet." He decided he'd wait for the instruction manual. Which means you get to wait another week or two for pictures of him attempting to fix it. (Assuming he lets me anywhere near him while he's working.)

Good grief! Are you still reading? This is a ridiculously long post for a simple story of washing clothes in a bathtub. We have previously discussed my difficulty with brevity.

*No, I had not dried off and dressed yet. Yes, I walked down the hall nekkid.

No longer a newby

I just checked. I knew it was soon. Lo and behold, it's today!! A year ago today I started my blog. Here's the first post. Rather inauspicious, isn't it?

This is only the beginning

and so far I have no idea what I am doing. More later, maybe with more substance. Maybe not.

Monday mish-mash

As I sit in my nest I look out the window at the sunlight shining on the tree outside, just the top leaves are in the sunbeams now. There's a lovely gentle breeze, not too warm, not too cool, coming through the open window fluttering the edges of today's newspaper. It is early evening, 5:30 as I begin this post. This is just about my least favorite time of day, even on a gorgeous day like today. As the sun sinks lower in the western sky my heart seems to go with it, down, down, almost extinguished now. Once the night takes over and there is nothing left of sunlight except the faint traces of color on the western horizon, then I get a second wind and can work on into the night. But right now I am all sadness. It isn't a specific sadness, I can't tell you what I'm upset about, but I feel as though I'm about to cry. 

I had another interesting conversation with Twitch on the way home from school this afternoon. Almost every conversation with Twitch is at least interesting, quite often surreal. Nevertheless,we saw the school bus that comes through this neighborhood, the one he would ride if I wasn't such a softy to take him to and from school. He rode that bus once or twice when we first moved to this neighborhood. It was a negative experience. I waved to the driver as she went by (an acquaintance of mine, of course) and Twitch said "That's an awful bus." I asked if he refered to the bus itself or the students who ride the bus. As I suspected, it's the students. He said he didn't like them because they all thought he was gay.  HUH? I need more information about what you just said there, boy. He says there's nothing wrong with being gay (good, glad you agree). Is there something wrong with other people thinking you are gay? No, not if that's all there is to it. What he objects to is the way he is treated if they think he is gay. Ah, I begin to see the light. And he begins to feel the sting of homophobic bullying. Just a small taste, but I think it will help him to be more sympathetic to the plight of the repressed.  And it increases my general sadness.

On a somewhat lighter note, I thought I'd share with you the costume idea Superman has for this Halloween season. He did this to me Friday night. It was painful. Frightening. Shocking, as he rounded the corner and I was assaulted with THIS.

It's Dr. Plaid!

He defeats the evil foes (and everyone else within sight range) by blinding them with his offensive fashion sense.

His suspenders are red with little images of Christmas ornaments on them. He has a pair of rainbow suspenders that I think would be more (in)appropriate. We shall see. Though it is hard to tell from this picture, he is wearing argyle socks. He says he wants to find a plaid cap, something like these tam o'shanters. 

(when I was taking these pictures and groaning about how terrible he looks, Diva asked if I would delete the pictures, since he looks so bad. I told her "No, honey, I'm going to post them on the internet for the whole wide world to see.")

And while we are on the subject of frightening images, this is a picture Sproing took of me.

He wanted me to take off my glasses, so when I did I also shook my hair around. When I looked like this he exclaimed "Mom! You look just like a rock star!" and took my picture. Oh dear.

You may rest at ease now. I come to inform you that Sproing has new shoes. His wonderful daddy took him to get new shoes late last week, shortly after I told you the story of the poor boy being without shoes that fit. He is very proud of his new shoes.

When Sproing and I were goofing around with the camera the other day Superman was lying down like a tired man in the bed.

 

I took this picture because I like his feet. Doesn't he have nice feet? (To those of you who aren't averse to feet) I like the way there's a bit of hair on the top of his arch, and the feet are attenuated, alluding to a grace he does not possess. I like the way his legs flop when he's lying in bed like this. I like that it's cool enough for him to wear sweat pants. :-)

There is more news on the laundry/washing machine saga, but I think I'll wait until tomorrow to post that. This post has gotten long and has too many elements to keep track of anyway.