I am livid

I haven't been this angry in I don't know how long. I have finally calmed down enough to be able to type. Whether I'll actually be able to write or not, we shall see. 

Diva. O.M.G. Keep in mind, she's only eleven years old. OK. First of all there's the sex thing I mentioned a few days ago. I got home late Wednesday night, and had a discussion with her about it Thursday afternoon. 

But on Thursday afternoon, I had to hunt for her. See, she's grounded; not allowed to go out of the house except to attend school. But she left the house within 15 minutes of getting home from school. I wasn't watching her. I stupidly assumed that since she knew she was grounded, that she'd stay home. Nope. I found her, and she seemed incredulous that she was grounded. Couldn't figure out why. Then she lied to me, saying her daddy said she would be grounded over the weekend, but not Thursday. I called Daddy. He assured me he had said no such thing to her. 

Thursday afternoon the school hosted a yearbook signing "social" that some of the kids were going to. I'm not sure how the attendees were chosen, whether they had to buy special tickets to go, or if they earned the privilege. I don't know. One of the teacher chaperons was collecting tickets, though. Diva had been looking forward to going to this event. Well, after her previous indiscretions she was not allowed to go. So she snuck out of the house, hung out with her friends, and I assume she was waiting until time for this little party so she could walk over there. I scotched her plans by finding her and dragging the poor thing home. You should have seen her countenance. She looked as though she was being persecuted unjustly. She genuinely seems to not realize that she has done something wrong. 

She was frantic about going. She told me that if she didn't get her yearbook at the party that afternoon, all the left over yearbooks would be thrown away. I knew that to be untrue, but I checked up on the information. Yep, she'd lied to me again. I went to the school and asked the teacher. Yearbooks get distributed next week for those who didn't get them early. 

I left her at home with Light (we're still talking about Thursday afternoon) while I ran a couple of errands. When I got home, Diva was gone again. A couple of her friends came by to see her, and Light told them Diva couldn't play. They went around to her bedroom window. Light heard Diva talking to them, so she went to check on Diva. The child was in the process of climbing out her window. Light pulled her back inside and Diva got violent and shoved her sister into the doorjamb. She climbed back out the window and wandered off with her friends. 

Diva showed up shortly after I got home. Superman arrived just after I did, and she walked in with him. We questioned her about what happened, and she lied again. She said she'd opened the window to let the cat inside. She denied climbing out the window. When pressed, she would only say that she almost went out. Or something like that. It was funny, except it wasn't, how she refused to admit what she had done. 

She's been up to it again today. I discovered before I left for Baltimore that my collection of state quarters was missing. While I was away, Superman cleaned up the corner of the room where my quarter collection lives and he didn't find it. She says she didn't take it, but I don't believe her. She said she couldn't remember where the display folder was, indicating that she had taken it. 

She needed to have her hair "done." She arranged with an older girl from the neighborhood to do it for her. That was supposed to happen this afternoon, but the older girl wasn't at home. Sometime around 9:00 tonight Diva snuck out again to meet up with these girls. I'm not sure if they came by to get her, or what. Superman and I went to ask her a question and she was gone. Light said Diva had told her she was leaving. Light said "Did you ask Mama?" Diva lied, said that I knew all about it. It is not alright for her to go out after 6:00, especially if we don't know where she is or that she has left. Does that make sense? She seems to be completely befuddled about what was wrong with her behavior. 

Oh, and when I tried to talk to her about what happened with the boys (yes, there were two) when she had sex, she denied having sex. The boy and his sister, however, say that it did happen. The word I got was that they were all naked, and each of the boys took a turn lying on top of her. I have no way of knowing if there was any penetration, but even if not, lying naked together like that is close enough to be sex for the purposes of this discussion. She assured me that she had not taken off her pants at all that afternoon, except to use the bathroom and she was by herself in the bathroom. Lies. 

I made an appointment for her to see my gynecologist. I spoke with the doctor's nurse, who asked what I wanted them to do. I told her I want them to scare the shit out of the child. The nurse assured me that they could do that, and would be happy to. She will have a simple pelvic exam, a PAP smear, and they'll test for chlamydia and gonorrhea. Then the doctor will talk to her about STDs, with gross pictures to illustrate the point. 

I fear that it won't really scare Diva, though. She doesn't make the connection. The idea of consequences does not filter into her little brain. When she experiences consequences, (and believe me, she does) the child feels unjustly persecuted. She can't understand that the current unpleasantness is in any way related to what she did. She sees nothing wrong with what she does. If she wants to do it, then it's OK. 

She goes in for the psych tests in 1.5 weeks. It can't come soon enough. 

am home

I have a kitten sleeping on my chest. She is putting me to sleep.

I got home at 9:30 last night after a very long drive. But part of that drive took place on twisty-windey roads through the mountains, so I was pleased. Today I'm just tired. 

I am waiting on a call from my gynecologist's nurse re: Diva. I want to talk to her before I make an appointment. 

Had a marvelous time in Baltimore. Really like spending time with Indigo. I miss him now. I'm glad he'll be here in 5 weeks. 

I don't have anything else to say right now. I'll post some pictures and write some more when I'm not so sleepy. In the meantime, I'll take a nap. Gawd, I love naps.

Notes from the road

Today has been a traveling day for me, and tomorrow will be much the same. I am in Lexington VA at a hotel that was stamped with a cookie cutter, pretty much like the other hotels along this road. And like the other hotels at every exit on the interstate all up and down the eastern seaboard and beyond. It has a bed, warm running water in the bathroom, and the air conditioner works! 

I have been in Baltimore since last Friday. This week Baltimore has been warm and humid. It hasn't been really hot, and the temps cooled off throughout the weekend, but not much. The humidity has remained high, though, and there isn't a lot of air movement through Indigo's house. It's a row house, like bazillions of other row houses in that city. It seems as though air flow was not the primary concern of the architects 100+ years ago. Eh. 

I am taking a long and winding route home. I was originally planning to leave Baltimore tomorrow, but with the situation at home being so tense I decided to leave today. I still won't get home until tomorrow, but it won't be as long and hard a trip so I'll arrive (hopefully) a little more refreshed than I would if I drove the 12 hours straight through in one day. And I've taken the scenic route. I drove on Skyline Drive through parts of Virginia today. It would have been majestically beautiful if the sky had been clear. Mostly I saw fog. That was fun, though. When the fog is pretty dense I see ghosts in the road ahead of me. They flit in and out, only appearing for a second. Sometimes the ghosts look like big cars or buildings or very large animals. The one time I rounded a curve to find a large doe in the middle of the street, I had to realize that it was really a deer, not a figment of the fog. She proceeded safely across the road. All is well. 

I saw quite a few turkeys today. Hens, mostly(I think they were), and solitary. I have always seen turkeys in flocks, with a tom or two and a passel of hens. I suppose these turkeys may have been young males. I don't know, but it was fun seeing them. 

I have a bunch of stuff to deal with when I get home. I will make an appointment for Diva to see the gynecologist. I think she needs to have an examination as soon as possible. I'm hoping the doctor can scare her with frightening information. I'm hoping she listens to the doctor better than she listens to me. I'm her mother. I obviously don't know anything. 

Thank you. All of you who have expressed concern, wished us good luck with this situation, offered to have a few glasses of wine (or hard liquor) on our behalf, you have been a great encouragement to me. This isn't an easy situation (duh) and I don't expect any advice, necessarily. We have some medical/psychiatric support in place and things are in process. Meanwhile, your encouragement really helps my spirits. 

On the agenda for tonight is a warm bath, then sleep. I shall return with more interesting information (or the same old dull stuff) as soon as possible. 

Meanwhile, back at the bawdy house

I talked to Superman about half an hour ago. He had this bombshell to drop: Diva has been having sex with one of the other 5th grade boys from our neighborhood. Yes, Diva, who will be 11.5 on the 4th of June. How did we discover this? The "young man's" parents came 'round to let us know about it. They just discovered the indiscretion themselves, following up on a rumor they'd overheard. From what Superman told me, the boy's parents were very nice, very concerned (of course) and felt that as her parents, we really needed to know what is going on. 

So now we know. Are we surprised? No. Are we distressed? You had better believe it! Do we know what the hell to do about it? No. I expected something like this, really, just not so soon. 

I'm still reeling. Superman is still reeling. My mind is buzzing with ideas, options, possibilities, worst case scenarios. And we will think about it tomorrow. And the next day. And this too shall pass, eventually. I'm just afraid it will be replaced with something worse. 

No, I can't think about it right now. I'll explode. 

Gawd, I wish I was making this up. 

The situation warrants

an update. Yes, I am in Baltimore. Right now I'm sitting in Indigo's living room on his new recliner. It's very comfy, and it reclines so as to comfortably allow me to type away on the computer. What fun! Indigo made waffles this morning! 

I actually left home at my target time! I was so impressed with me. I woke up Friday morning 15 minutes before my alarm was set to go off. I had set it to 4:00 a.m., but evidently I'd had enough sleep fifteen minutes before that. I had packed almost everything into the car the day before, so there was not much to do to get ready to go. I pulled out of the driveway at approximately 4:50. I would have been here at the 12 hour mark had I not arrived in the greater Baltimore area right at rush hour. I made very good time until I was within about 20 miles of my destination. That final 20 miles took 45 minutes. Ah, well. I made it, and have been enjoying myself ever since. 

Indigo and I went shoe shopping yesterday. A refresher in Java trivia: Java hates shoe shopping. We went to the DSW store. I found the shoes I needed with the second pair I tried on!!!! Yes, I only tried on two pairs. The lovely young woman assisting us was a pleasure to work with. Indigo and I were having lots of fun being silly, and she joined in the fun. I'll have to take a picture of my new shoes. 

I have some pictures I want to share, but they are still in my camera. I'm too comfy in this comfy chair to get my camera and download the photos. I will get to it later. 

I drove through the Shenandoah Valley. Wow. Gorgeous! I love that area, slightly east of the Appalachian mountains in North Carolina and Virginia. I would move there if the opportunity were right. I stopped at one point somewhere in Virginia to stretch my legs and use the bathroom. It was so pretty, but it smelled of skunk. I assume all of the Shenandoah Valley doesn't always smell of skunk, but the part I smelled was stinky. I will forgive. Heck, I'm over it already. 

There may be a few other things I wanted to tell you, but I can't remember right now. I'll get around to yammering on about other stuff within the next day or so. In the meantime, enjoy your weekend, and for those of us in the U.S., enjoy the holiday weekend. 

Well,... plus news of an impending road trip!

After hemming and hawing about it for literally months, I decided to share my blog address with my English prof. I just sent out an email to her with the link to this here bloggie thing. This week we (the class) have been discussing a few of the forms of writing found online. Today's discussion, (which I need to go write on that discussion board) is about blogging. It is time to show her my online place. 

Now, on to other news: yes, I am taking a road trip! I know I was all wishy-washy on this topic a few weeks ago, but situations have transpired to bring about a perfect-ish opportunity to visit Baltimore. Well, technically I'm not visiting Baltimore, exactly. If I had my druthers I'd avoid Baltimore like the plague. However, my darling friend Indigo lives there, as you may know. In order to visit Indigo, I must go to Baltimore. Alas, it is my fate. He gets to return the favor and come visit me in a few weeks, too. What fun! 

The details are that I leave early* tomorrow morning. I'll drive most of the day to cover the 600 miles between here and there. I'll be in Baltimore until mid-week next week, probably coming home on Wednesday. Updates as the situation warrants.

There is much to do in preparation for this trip. I have begun the preps, but the list of things yet to do is much longer than the list of things accomplished. On that note, TTFN.

*The definition of "early" is yet to be determined. Ideally I will be out of town before 5:00 a.m. Much depends on how ready I am this evening, and how early I go to sleep!!

A Meme

Stolen from Ur-Spo

1. What is your current obsession?

I'm too tired for obsessions.

2. What do you see outside your window? 

I can’t see out the window because it’s too dirty. I get a hint of green tree canopy, though.

3. If you could have any super power what would it be? 

Transmogrification

(click to embiggen)

4. What is your favorite color?

I like all colors. My least favorite is red, though there are many applications in which red is the perfect color. I am not fond of wearing red clothes.

5. Who was the last person you hugged?

That would be Sproing, who jumped on me before I got out of bed this morning.

6. Which animal would you be?

Depending on the circumstances, probably a chicken

7. What’s for dinner?

Twitch is fixing chili. This will be interesting. 

8. What’s the last thing you bought?

I spent money for Diva and Sproing to get an ice cream treat during the school’s field day on Friday. Does that count? I don’t remember the last thing I bought for myself.

9. What are you listening to right now?

The hum of the refrigerator

10. What are your current favorite films?

“Enchanted” “Noises Off”

11. What’s on your bedside table?

Dust. Under that, I’m not sure. Lots of miscellaneous papers and books and CDs and I don't know what else.

12. If you could have a house totally paid for, and fully furnished, anywhere in the world, where would it be?

The Appalachian Mountains

13. What would you like to have in your hands right now? 

A bowl of chocolate ice cream with malted milk powder stirred into it

14. What is your favorite children’s book?

Fox in Socks

15. What is your favorite tea flavor?

Orange spice, I guess. I know I've had better tea than that, but it has been a while and I forget what the flavor was.                      

16. What is your favorite article of clothing?

An old wrap-around apron, soft and worn

17. If you could go anywhere in the world for the next hour, where would you go?

Central Park, New York City

18. What did you want to become as a child?

I never did figure that out. I’m still not sure.

19. What posters/pictures do you have on your bedroom wall? 

A piece that Light painted in her painting class recently - I should take a picture of it and post it here. You might like it.

20. What is your plan for tomorrow?

Sew a little bit, prepare for a road trip!

21. What was your first job?

Care provider in an institution for the severely handicapped

22. Say something to the person/s who tagged you:

I kinda tagged myself for this one, having stolen it from Spo. Hi, Spo!

23.  Post a favorite childhood photograph of yourself:

Old Friends

Just this week I received an email from an old friend of mine. She and I have been friends since we were in the 6th grade. My friendship with her is the longest lasting friendship I have. Over the years we have been able to pick up right where we left off after about half an hour of catching each other up on recent events. 

It has been a few years since we last communicated. She moved a few times, as did I. We still have the same email addresses, though, and she made contact with me a couple of days ago.

I wrote back, telling her briefly (well, briefly for me) about me and the family. I received an email in response this morning. She relates some interesting things about herself and her husband and kids. Her youngest child is two years older than Light. He is a senior at University of Florida, doing very well, and will be applying to med school soon. Her other two kids are also doing very well. 

This morning I sent off a somewhat more detailed missive telling her more about Twitch, and getting into some specifics about Diva and Sproing and the trouble we've been having with them. 

I have yet to tell her what I've been up to in the past three years or so. She doesn't know what is now the passion of my heart. She hasn't heard about me and The Gay. I ended today's email by telling her that there is more going on, but I will tell her more in the next email since this one was long enough already. 

So I'm going to tell her, of course, about my wonderful discovery of the fabulosity that is the gay community. 

A bit of background: her mother-in-law is a lesbian, I'm pretty sure. My friend and I met her in-laws at the same time, back when we were about 12 years old. The guy who is now her brother-in-law was in our class throughout middle and high school, and we both went to the church where their family was very active. Southern Baptist, naturally. There are five children in that family; the oldest is a girl, the oldest brother was a guy I had a bad crush on all through middle school, the second son married my friend, the third son was in our class, and the youngest son is a year or two younger than our classmate. The other member of the household was a woman, contemporary to their mother, who shared a bedroom with mother. 

There were a lot of people in the house, obviously, and bedroom space was at a premium. Nevertheless. The two women, Shirley (the kids' mother) and Bobbie, shared a large waterbed. Bobbie looked very dykish. Heavy-set, short cropped hair, somewhat masculine features. She wore dresses when I saw her, at church, and always wore a girdle. I find that amusing, but beside the point. The point, though, is that though nothing was ever said, it's pretty obvious that they were lovers. They lived together like spouses, for sure, both of them riding herd on the kids like parents. 

Even in my naive youth, I got a strong lesbian vibe from their oldest daughter. I kinda liked her, too. I didn't know her well, as she was a good bit older than me and was away at college when I was hanging around with the boys. 

Shirley and Bobbie still live together. Last time I visited them (many years ago now) the kids were all out of the house, and they had moved to a small town north of Orlando (where we all used to live). They had separate bedrooms, which kinda surprised me. I have no idea, though, what the sleeping arrangements were. I didn't ask. It was then and still is none of my business. 

My friend and her husband are very active in church. Her husband is now a preacher (he always had leanings in that direction) in addition to being an Emergency Medical Tech. She is active in the music ministry. Their youngest son is planning to be a medical missionary. 

She's on Facebook. (Isn't everyone?) She wants to "friend" me. I looked at my friends list this morning. Except my husband and Birdie, I think everyone else on my freinds list is gay. And come on, y'all, Birdie is an honorary gay.  I find that amusing, myself. Since most of the people who will have anything to do with me these days are gay, it makes ever so much sense. I found her profile, and sent a friend invitation to her. We shall see what we shall see, won't we?

In my next email I will tell her about my passion for the gay community. Pretty much all of my old friends who know of my involvement with The Gay are now former friends. I am not afraid to tell her about The Gay, but I am afraid she will no longer accept me.  Since she and I have been friends for so long, and such good, strong, sister-like friends, will she remain my friend? 

Simon and Garfunkel, natch.

Breaking News (not)

I just removed my "f" key and cleaned underneath it. I hope it responds better now. F f-ity f f follicle family fifty of find friend ffff found fond front frond firm foundation. 

Never mind me. I'm just bored. 

Light has junque under/in her keyboard, too. She has never popped any of them off, and doesn't know if it is possible on her computer. She has a Dell Interferon* (or whatever it's called). Does anyone know if those keys can be removed? 

*Interferometer? Idolater? Impersonator? Inquisitor?**

**No one expects the Spanish Inquisition.

Indeed

Light turned me on to a new Lolz site called GraphJam.  ([dot]com) I am very amused. I saw this one and had to share it! 

see more Funny Graphs

It doesn't quite fit this column, unfortunately. Here's what it says:

Take over the world. And then make it fabulous.

Convince people to mind their own business.