On the agenda for Saturday

I have been either studying or pretending to study since mid-morning. As I type this the time is 10:44 p.m. To help keep myself on track I made a prioritized list of subjects to study and assignments to complete. So far I've completed an assignment in one subject and studied for a test in another. 

I have three tests this week; a psych 101 exam on Monday at 8:00 a.m., the first exam in counseling on Tuesday, and our second exam in developmental psych on Wednesday. I'm really glad they aren't on the same day. I feel almost ready for the psych 101 exam. It covers 2 chapters, and I've been cramming the info from the second chapter into my head most of the afternoon. I had a very firm grasp on the Chapter 1 info a week or two ago, but I need to refresh my memory. I'll do that tomorrow. I've had enough of that one today. 

The counseling class, however, isn't so firmly ensconced in my brain. Not the raw facts I need in order to pass the test, anyway. I haven't even finished reading all the chapters that the test covers. That one is now high on my priority list. But right now I'm writing. This is my reward for finishing the other stuff today. 

But I wanted to share something interesting I found in my psych 101 book. It's about aggression. Psychologists have developed a frustration-aggression hypothesis. It states that frustration produces aggression. duh (See? College isn't so hard) But that's just the framework for what I want to show you. "People often become aggressive when they are in pain or are exposed to loud noise or foul odors. Extreme heat has also been linked to aggression in several studies."(Wood, Wood, & Boyd, 2007)* That explains my story right there. Of course "extreme" is a subjective concept. In my condition anything over 80F (27C) accompanied by humidity above 50% is extreme. Oh, and check this out: Berkowitz (no, not that Berkowitz) has used these findings to propose an idea he calls the cognitive-neoassociationistic model. WTF? Can you say that three times, really fast? According to my textbook, he "suggested that anger and aggression result from aversive events and from unpleasant emotional states, such as sadness, grief, and depression." (Wood et al., 2007)* Well gosh, it's a wonder I'm not a whole lot more aggressive than I am. 

Although there is much more reading and thought organization waiting on me, I plan to go to bed now. A good night's sleep is critical to proper brain function. I know that's in the literature somewhere, but I'm too tired and I can't think clearly enough to find it. 

*Wood, S. E., Wood, E. G., Boyd, D. (2007). The world of psychology, portable edition (Vol. 6). Boston: Pearson Allyn & Bacon. p. 817.

Um, where was I?

More snippets. It's all I know anymore

• I deleted my MySpace page this evening. I feel so free!! I never have liked my page or profile on that site. It just didn't fit who I really am now. I set up the account right after I met C, I think. It might have been before he moved in here, even. It was set up as more of a Mommy site, but that's not primarily how I identify myself now. And I never checked the site anyway. I get mail every so often referring to MySpace, which is how I remembered it tonight. And I figured out how to cancel the account all by myself. I feel so smart and shit. 
• Diva is going to join a bowling league. Y'all, no offence or anything, but I have a prejudice against bowlers. Not so much those who go occasionally just for a night out or something. I don't know why they bother me. Perhaps I was bitten by a bowling ball as a young child. I don't like bowling alleys (the noise drives me insane) and there's just something about the kind of people who typically hang around bowling alleys that sticks in my craw. Anyway, one of Diva's friends is in this kid league that plays on Saturdays and she's begging Diva to join the league. Seems one of the other girls on the team doesn't show up regularly and they have to forfeit the games. I'm can see where this will be good for Diva. You know, being part of a team, doing positive things with friends, yada yada. I just can't stay with her at the lanes. I'll flip out and start shooting people. Naw, I wouldn't do that. I'd start correcting their grammar over the PA system. Then they'd shoot me. 
• I have tests next Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday. I'm not ready for them. I'm supposed to be studying tonight, but damn. The blogs trapped me. 
• I got really tired yesterday afternoon when I was trying to write notes on index cards for my counseling class. I couldn't keep my eyes open, so I decided to take a little nap. I lay down at 5:30. I woke up with my alarm clock at 5:25 this morning. I felt really good when I woke up. However, I went to school early this morning to do some more studying for this counseling class. I kept falling asleep while writing up the note cards! What's up with that? I'd just had 12 hours of sleep!! I stayed awake just fine in the class, which started at 9:45. But the hour and a half before that I kept drifting off. Weird. Anyway, I have my first test in that class on Tuesday. I haven't even read one of the chapters we're being tested on. 
• I talked to Light this afternoon. She just finished up her January mini-term class today. She'll be coming home sometime soon, perhaps this weekend, then returns for the regular Spring semester early next week. It will be good to see her again. However, I have my study area set up in her bedroom. There's no room for a bed in here now. Oops. We'll have to work on that this weekend. 
• So on Tuesdays and Thursdays I have this counseling class. It's called Interviewing and Counseling, and is something of an introduction to clinical psychological counseling. Did I mention this class already? The first chapter of the book, which I have read, talks about the typical stages that new students go through as they begin to learn how to counsel. For instance, according to the book I'm supposed to be looking for one right answer to a client's problems. But there isn't only one right answer. See, I know that already. I'm then supposed to be all confused because I can't tell which of the many possible solution paths to take. Well, frankly I'm pretty much past that one, too. I usually have a sense about what kind of response is appropriate to give to someone in this or that dilemma. It's a sense, not something one can easily learn from a book. The fact that I'm 25-30 years older than most of the students in the class probably makes a huge difference. I have invaluable life experience. I do, however, have to know what the book says, know how to answer the questions on the test, and pass the damned class. The later chapters in the book are a bit more informative, thankfully.
• And I saw my therapist this afternoon. A lovely lady. I adore spending time chatting with her. I had all sorts of questions for her about the crap I'm learning in that counseling class. She blew it off, said to learn what I need to know to pass the test and not to worry too much about the stuff that doesn't make practical sense. This gal knows me pretty well. She is familiar with my abilities to talk to and listen to people. I need to be careful not to let the book learning hamper my natural abilities. Funny, too, that point is mentioned in the book! Eh. Whatever. 
• Someone snuck into my study earlier this week and got into my box of candy. I got a super good deal on my favorite boxed chocolates. Russel Stover Dark Assortment. Great stuff! One of the local drug stores had a special on Sunday and Monday only, a 12 oz. box for only $3.99. That's more than half off the MSRP. I got it Monday evening. I'm not sure who knew it was in here. I hid it at the bottom of one of the desk drawers, under a bunch of paper. I haven't touched it since I put it in there Monday, not until this evening when I went to get the box out of my drawer. It was opened. The box was covered in the cellophane wrap when I stuck it in the drawer. It wasn't covered this evening, and somebody had eaten about a third of the candies. Pisses me off! They do this to me all the time. Boundaries, people. What's mine is mine! If you want some, ask me. I might say no, I might say yes. But I won't be mad at you if you ask. Now I'm pisssed off. And guess what? There isn't a lock on the door to this room. Hell, there isn't a door to this room! This is the room C and S used to be in, and they tore the door to pieces. It has holes and dings and smudges all over it.(More boundary issues, really) Superman took the door off, intending to replace it, but we haven't gotten a new door yet. So there isn't a door here to lock. But dammit, I shouldn't have to lock the door! These monsters I live with should respect my stuff. They don't, obviously. Did I mention I'm pissed off? 
  
• I have some homework due tomorrow, so I'm gonna do that now. I'll be back as soon as I can. Maybe this weekend for a little while. I miss you all!

Mud-luscious

Thought for today: 

The world is mud-luscious and puddle-wonderful. -E.E. Cummings, poet (1894-1962) 

Isn't that glorious? It reminds me of Mame's guide to life: "Life is a banquet, and most poor fools are starving to death." 

Check out the botany photo of the day. 

The genus name Amorphophallus is derived from Greek and means "shapeless or deformed phallus", and the species name titanum means "extremely large".

More fabulosity!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I formed a new theory yesterday about something. I remember the feeling, realizing that I had made a connection between two disparate ideas. Unfortunately, though, this morning I can't remember exactly what those two ideas are. I'm sure it will come up again. It had to do with something we're studying in one of my classes. I'll recognize it when I see it again. Does that ever happen to you? You have a grand idea but forget the details? I'm always forgetting details. Guess I'm more of a big picture kind of person. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

My English professor has mentioned blogs a few times in class. Nothing specific, just a passing reference. She knows I have a blog, but I haven't told her where it is. I don't want her to read this one, primarily because I want to be able to talk about things that happen at school without having to edit for the school audience. I am considering starting a new blog, one in addition to this one. One that I can share with my school mates. If I do I'll probably use WordPress. If I do I'll be sure to share it with you!! I'll link to that one from here, but not to hear from that one. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

As soon as I'm finished here I need to go to Diva's school. She has applied for a job at the school as a news anchor for the in-school TV station. This is a program the kids do every morning, their own presentation of morning announcements. It's a great idea, really. Of course Diva, being the diva she is, is applying for the Anchor 1 position. Here's a list of requirements:

• All students must maintain grades of C or better in all subject areas. (She got Cs and Bs on her latest report card!! I'm very pleased and impressed.)
• Students must follow all classroom, school, and bus rules.
• Students must be at school no later than 7:35 a.m.
• All students will be expected to be here to do their JOB!
• Take care of the news room and equipment. (Aaarrrgghh!! Parallel construction Fail!)
• Students will interview in person before a panel of teachers.
• Students must properly fill out the job application and return it on or before (today).

In the job description for the anchor positions the application states: "You will need to read a script containing the date, pledges, lunch menu, weather, birthdays, and any other announcements that need to be reported. Qualified candidates should be organized, responsible, confident, have a clear voice, and be a good reader. " Hmmm. Diva can't read well. She couldn't read the job description to me. She couldn't read the small print under the line for the parent signature. "By signing, you are agreeing to help enforce ALL requirements and responsibilities that are involved." She got "responsibility" but didn't know "enforce." She got mad at me when I asked her to read it out loud. 

On the application she answers the question "Why would you be the BEST person for this job?"

Because I am going to be in ACTS!* so I can spik clear and sing clear and read very good. The other people on oak expirerd me to sign up for it.

Kinda' cute, but really... Am I expecting too much from a 5th grader? She just doesn't seem like a good candidate for the job, IMHO. I love my baby girl, and I'm proud of how she's bringing her grades up this year. She barely passed 2nd, 3rd, and 4th grade. She also likes to goof off when it's time to work. Anyway, I need to take this application to the school because she forgot it this morning. -sigh-

*ACTS is a special arts emphasis magnet program she wants to attend next year. She's not qualified for that, either. She barely makes Cs. ACTS teaches at the gifted and talented level. 

Quickly now

Off all the things I've lost, I miss blogging the most. 

Well, perhaps not. And I've not really lost it. I'm just so damned busy now! There is so much to read and remember. I'm having a blast, really. I enjoy the challenge of new ideas. We're two weeks into the semester and I don't think I have the time management figured out. Time management has been a weakness of mine forever. I always got poor marks in grade school on the category "Uses Time Wisely." Oy. 

But I miss spewing my guts here on this bloggie thing. And I'm visiting the odd blog here and there, now and again when I can sneak one in, but it isn't the same. Perhaps I can get my life organized a bit better and have more time to read the blogs. I miss each one of you, even the ones who won't see this post because they don't read my blog. 

So let me tell you what I did today. Well, there was that nap. It was lovely. I had to nap in order to have the energy to shop. There is lots of homework to do, some of which I have finished. But I have lots of reading yet to do. But I'm not telling you about that now. I'm telling you about what all I got today.

My student loan money came through and I finally got my share. The lender sends the money to the school. The school takes what it needs for tuition and fees and such then cuts a check to the student (me, in this case) for the remaining balance. I picked up my check late last week, and deposited it in the bank Friday. I've been waiting for it 'cause I need some stuff. 

This afternoon I went out to get some stuff. I got a new printer, an HP Photosmart printer-scanner-copier. I paid less than the price posted in that link there, too. We've had an HP printer for a while. It's at least 11 years old. It was a gift from my step-mother when Sproing joined our family. He had his 11th birthday yesterday. Happy Birthday Sproing! The old printer we have is slow and sometimes doesn't like to talk to the computer, but it still works. This new one is superfancy. Of course I'm comparing it to an 11 year old model, so it looks great by comparison. It's a wireless printer. Superman got it all set up for me, and now I can click the print icon on my documents and ta-da! The printer spits our my page. This is gonna make my life so much easier. I can't connect to the old printer from my laptop. My laptop has MS Word 2007, while our old desktop has Word '03. In order to print anything I had to convert my documents into the '03 compatibility mode, copy them to my flash drive, upload them onto the old desktop, then print from there. This is SO much easier. 

I got a new portable hard drive to use for backing up my laptop. I haven't been able to back up my laptop since we got it. I tried using the CDs but I couldn't get that to work any time I tried. Now I've got a 250 GB portable hard drive. It wasn't nearly as simple to install as the printer. But whatever. I hope I did it right. I'm gonna start a back up here in a few minutes. 

Speaking of gigabytes, I finally bought myself one of those micro mini chip card thingies that go in phones. There's a port for that micro card in my little MP3 player. The store had those things on sale. I got 4 Gigs of storage on this teenie tinie little card no bigger than my thumbnail, and I paid $13 for it. I tell ya', they're giving away gigs these days. It boggles this old lady's mind. It's more samer than magic, y'all. 

I got myself a nice desk chair, too. I've been sitting in a hard wooden straight chair, the kind you find with dining tables. It's a nice chair as far as that goes, but it isn't good to sit in for long periods of time. It's also too high for my desk, and I've been very uncomfortable sitting at my desk to do my homework. Today I got a comfy chair with a mesh back so my back can breathe and won't overheat in the summer. It has adjustable height arm rests, swivels all the way around, and the seat height is adjustable too. You know, like a real office chair. That hopefully will make it a bit more comfortable to sit and do my homework. 

I bought 4 pairs of scissors. Scissors disappear from this house almost as fast as pens and pencils do. It's very frustrating. I got a cheap 3 pack of red handled all purpose scissors. I got these out of the package and walked around the house showing them to everyone. "See these scissors? They have a red handle. Watch as I put them in this drawer. These are scissors you may use, and please put them back when you are finished with them." (they won't put the scissors back, I promise you) 

The other scissors I got are much nicer. They're titanium coated and have the comfort grip plastic handles. The handles are gray. I paraded those scissors around the house, showing them to all and sundry. "See these scissors? Notice that the handle is NOT red. That means you may NOT use these scissors. Does anyone have any questions about this? These are MOMMY'S scissors. Very bad things will happen to you if you use Mommy's scissors." It may or may not help, but it certainly can't hurt. 

Ok, I've got a short story to read, and at least one chapter in my developmental psych book that I should skim if not read, and it's getting late. So cheers to one and all; I'm going to study.

Gathered from the foolishness of late night thought

From William Golding's essay "Thinking As a Hobby"

-It is easy to buy small plaster models of what you think life is like.

-If you set out to climb a mountain, no matter how far you climb you have failed if you cannot reach the top.

Tomorrow in class my English professor will likely ask us to write a brief reaction paper to this essay. These were my two favorite quotes from my first reading of the essay.

Ah, now I remember the other quote I found so interesting tonight. It is attributed to Harry S Truman in the email my mother sent. I'm too tired and lazy to verify.

-My choices early in life were either to be a piano player in a whore house or a politician. And to tell the truth, there's hardly any difference.

Update: the repercussions of misbehavior

It has been an interesting week for all of us. This week marks the end of the first semester in the local public schools. The kids got off early Wednesday and were out of school Thursday and Friday. They don't go Monday, either, as it is a federal holiday. Superman and I are both off Monday, too. But we were at work and school Thursday and Friday, and Twitch wasn't here Friday because he went with his scout troop on a snowboarding adventure. That left the Demonic Duo here alone. Danger-Will-Robinson! 

But they did pretty well Thursday and Friday because they were "corrected" on Wednesday. 

Wednesday was a bad day. You will recall that on Tuesday I got home and Diva had gotten herself into a sticky situation. Sproing was seeing his therapist at the time, which kept him from being complicit in the crimes. Wednesday, however, they were both here for three hours unsupervised. When I got home from school the house was a mess (more so than usual) and the kids were screaming at each other. They scream the nastiest things to each other, and it breaks my mother-heart. They had to tell me all about the horrid things the other did to him/her. It was like walking into a blasting zone. They hit me full force as soon as I walked through the door. 

I've learned to remain calm (at least on the outside) as I gather the information. It percolates through the brain grinds as I decide how to handle things. Sometimes I cry a little on the inside. Like when I got back to my bedroom at the end of the hall. As I set down my book bag to unlock the door* I saw the door and doorjamb had been violated. I called the two kids to me and showed them the door. Another thing I've learned: try not to ask "who" or "why" because there are no good answers to these questions in a situation like that. I said something like "what can you tell me about this?" Sproing spouted off that it was Diva's fault (it always is when he's telling the tale). She got a screw driver and jimmied the lock, let the kitten out of our room, took a CD Spanish course off our shelf and put it in the DVD player, I think.

Then she gave the kitten a bath. I know. WTF. She told me that Scher just stood in the bath and took it like a man, or something. Didn't like it much, but didn't fight. That's my understanding, anyway. It was pretty cold Wednesday and we keep our house on the cool side. The cat shouldn't have been wet. By the time I got home she was dry, though. A bit traumatized, but dry. She was also traumatized by the children fighting over her. I'm not sure if they actually pulled her in two directions, but I know they were grabbing at her while she was in the other's arms. She was subsequently swung around as the kid holding her removed her from the other's reach. That is precisely why I locked her in our bedroom, where she has food, water, and her litter box.

Oh, and they also threatened each other with knives. Yes, our kitchen knives. The cheese knife (which thankfully isn't too sharp) was on the floor beside Sproing's room. Diva said Sproing brought a knife into the laundry room where she was (hiding? who knows) and flashed it all around while threatening her. He says she told him she'd cut him, or something. It's the theatre of the absurd. 

On Tuesday we had a discussion with Diva about everything but the sex. That conversation is waiting in the wings, I just haven't had a chance to share it with her. But we discussed the other infractions. And Superman password protected his log-in on the laptop. It was the only internet access point in the house that wasn't password protected. 

Diva is banned from all computer use in the home for a while. She's grounded until next Wednesday. I don't remember exactly what else we discussed Tuesday, because Wednesday was a whole new show.

Wednesday all hell broke loose. "Just wait 'til your Daddy gets home!!" I don't say that, actually, but it's usually when Daddy gets home that the real consequences occur. They got a long lecture (my speciality) then a spanking. We don't spank very often anymore. They should be getting too old for that, though their behavior suggests otherwise. We are both very specific about how and why to spank. There is a huge difference between beating and spanking in both attitude and technique. With a spanking, contact only occurs on the large fleshy area of the buttocks and/or the upper thigh. Spanking is only administered when the administrator has calmed down and is not boiling mad at the spankee. 

Pertinent aside: My dear friend Indigo has visited us here in our humble abode. Indigo is an abuse survivor. He was subjected to some truly heinous treatment at the hands of people who were supposed to love and protect him. He is permanently scarred from those experiences, both physically and emotionally. He has some strong opinions about corporal punishment, as one might expect. He has always believed that spanking is wrong, until he met Sproing. After spending a week in this house with Sproing and Diva he has altered his opinion about spanking. He still has strong opinions about it and how spanking is applied, but he no longer dismisses it out of hand. 

So Diva and Sproing both got spanked. And afterward they were so nice! They are both under suspension until next week, with no computer time, no broadcast TV. (They can watch movies. I have limits as to how much their punishment punishes me.) All the toys have been taken from their rooms and must be earned back. They can't leave the yard, though going outside is encouraged, especially now that it isn't as cold. 

On Thursday, here by themselves (Twitch was here, but mostly avoided them. I don't blame him.) they were wonderful. They played cheerfully with each other and worked to good effect. Sproing cleaned the living room and swept the kitchen floor. Diva cleaned the rest of the kitchen and began folding the huge mound of clothes in the laundry room. On Friday she continued with the clothes and got a lot of them folded and put away. 

This weekend Sproing has been a little turd. He is a small brown mobile brier patch. He is mouthy, insulting, annoying, etc. The benefits of that spanking lasted about 2 days. 

After the good work they did around here on Thursday they each got to go out with a parent for a treat. Oh, and Diva had her appointment with her therapist. As much as these kids need a firm hand and consistent discipline, they need rewards and overt expressions of love and approval. I have been trying to be as loving as possible. I took Sproing out for his reward on Thursday, and Diva and I went out together yesterday. One on one time with a parent is what they most like. 

It is so hard to express love to a brier patch. I try and he sticks me (on purpose). Occasionally he'll come up and give me a hug or snuggle up to me, but often as not he'll ignore me, sass me, yell at me, or argue with me as I attempt to help him. There are times I would like to just bitch-slap him, but I don't. Most of the time. There have been rare occasions when I didn't quite stop myself in time, but I don't agonize over it. I mean, really, he begs for it. And I hardly ever lose control of myself. 

And so it goes. This is my life. I do the best I can. 

I am taking a Developmental Psychology class. So far we have touched briefly on a few theories of child development, in which things generally go like this: if a child receives the love and nurture and stimulation he needs during these early stages of development, then he will develop these healthy attributes and be a fine and functional individual. Well, that logically implies that if he isn't raised right he'll be messed up. Therefore, if he's messed up, it's the parents' fault. I agonzied over this for a few days. But here's how I've decided to understand my life and my kids: if a normal child receives love and yada yada, then he will be healthy. But if the kid has chemical, physiological, genetic traits that manifest as unhealthy behavior, it isn't entirely my fault if he's fucked up. And really, I do the best I can. I do better than many could under these conditions. There are areas of our lives that could and perhaps should be better. If I were more organized and self disciplined and would keep to a routine better, that would probably have a positive effect on my children. But you know? I just don't. So sue me. Or come and live in my house with my family for a few weeks while I go on a trans-Atlantic cruise and tour the British Isles. 

And that's what I think. 

*Yes, I have to lock my bedroom door when I leave. I hate that I have to, but experience has taught me that I must. Obviously I left the door unlocked Tuesday when Diva got in and ... Well, you know the story.

Coming up for air

I love school! I'm so pumped just being in class. I wish the class periods lasted a little bit longer. Especially my Mon/Wed/Fri classes, which only last an hour. Tues/Thurs I'm in class for 1.5 hours, and that's better. I feel more alive than I have in a long time.

...in some respects. In other respects, I'm dead. As in "dead tired." I may have mentioned that my iron levels are low. I'm taking an iron supplement, but it takes a while for that to make a difference. I haven't been sleeping as long as I should. I stay up late studying then get up at 5:30 to start the new day. All my classes are back-to-back, so I don't have a break between them, but once I get a break I'm done for the day. 

There is an awful lot of information coming at me really fast. I have always been a thinker, so the brain work isn't too different. I just haven't had to think this big and this fast in a while. Hopefully I'll get into the swing of it and it won't seem quite so, I dunno, intense. 

All but two of my classes are freshman level courses, and sure enough there are a lot of freshmen around. 18-19 year olds are stoopid, irritating, thoughtless, clueless, and really try my patience. I smile and shut up mostly. I met a woman who is in a situation similar to mine. She's in her 40s, has 4 kids (teens in high school and a couple of 20 somethings out of the house), is getting a degree in psych and minoring in business for a mid-life career change. We were both extremely happy to see each other in the two classes we share. 

I have yet to finish the first chapters in two of my textbooks. I start them, read about halfway through, then either fall asleep or get pulled away to something else. I've glanced over the rest, and looked over the power point slides for one of them. But I have tests and stuff next week. I plan to get through the chapters this weekend, to read and understand the whole thing. 

I am exploring the campus. I wandered all over the student center building the other day and discovered a secret hallway. Well, it's really not all that secret, but it isn't obvious. Many of the student support services have offices there. This is a stretch for me. I'm great at driving down different roads to see what's there. But to walk around and chance a personal encounter with another human being is more bravado than I usually muster. The biggie was going into the cafeteria. It is big and strange and full of people. There are social expectations, those unwritten codes of behavior that if violated make you look like a dweeb. 

It's a fancy modern cafeteria, with different stations for different types of food. There are no trays and no tray runways. It works a lot like a buffet restaurant, actually. Diners get a plate and use tongs to pick up various food stuffs. There are a few places where a cafeteria lady dishes out portions. I suspect they do that to keep the boys from scarfing all the more expensive food. There's a salad bar, an area with the main entree and side dishes du jour, a pizza station, a sandwich station, a deli type area. (I think that's what it is. I haven't been to that one yet. There is also a dessert station and an array of cereal dispensers. Cheerios, frosted mini wheats, raisin bran, chocolate rice crispies, sugar coated puffed wheat, and a few others. I think there are 8 different cereals. 

There are a couple of drink stations. It's a Pepsi campus! Pepsi is my favorite, and around here there are lots of Coke-only establishments. The drink stations offer soda and juice, healthy or flavored fizzy sugar water. And milk. Coffee too.  Of the cookies I've sampled I like the oatmeal raisin the best. Those cookies are fantastic dipped in the coffee! I saw a soft serve ice cream dispenser, but haven't had any of that yet. The food is excellent, the facility is comfortable and welcoming. If you are looking for a good school based on the quality of the dining facilities, I recommend Lander. 

The thing I miss the most is visiting your blogs. I haven't had time to post or read much of anything. I barely keep up with my email. Hopefully I'll establish a routine of study and home obligations that allows me to slip in a bit more blog time as well. 

That's all my brain will reveal right now. If I could post on the go I'd have shared all sorts of little snippets of insight or interesting tidbits that crossed my mind during the week. Unfortunately I didn't write them down and now can't remember much. 

Disturbia in Javaland

I'll get to the disturbia momentarily, but first a word about school. I had a great day at school today. My other two classes met, and I think Tues/Thurs will be my favorite days. I wondered around the student center today, making more of an exploration than I have before. I ate lunch in the main dining hall. Y'all!! The food at Lander is good!!   Someone told me there is a dining plan I can buy, even as a commuter student. It's called something like the 50/50 plan, where for $50 I get 50 meals during the semester. It sounds too good to be true. I need to see the head of dining services, and she was busy when I went to check it out, and I didn't wait. I'll go back and see probably tomorrow. 

Now to the disturbia-

Diva (the daughter who just had her 11th birthday three weeks before Christmas) was home for an hour or so before I got home. I went from school to the high school to pick up Twitch and we didn't get home until just after 4. Diva usually gets home between 2:45 and 3:00. When Twitch and I got home Diva came around from the back yard with her book bag on her back, saying she was waiting for us to get home so she could get in. Well, the door wasn't locked, and she said she saw it closed and assumed it was locked. Whatever. No red flag, but duly noted. 

The mail was on the kitchen table, so I assumed Superman had come home for lunch or something. Duly noted. 

Came back to my room and saw my laptop on the desk/tray that I use when I'm using the computer in bed. The laptop was closed, but the power indicator light was on. I know I turned it off before I left home. So I opened the computer and saw Superman was logged on. Hmmm, he must have been online when he was home for lunch. Duly noted. I opened his user page (or whatever it's called) to see if I could close things down before opening mine. Well, there was a web page opened, an order page with an error message saying the credit card information is incorrect. I also notice that it's Internet Explorer. He always uses Firefox. I always use Google Chrome. Hmmm. Red flag. I looked carefully at this order page. What do you know! It has Diva's full name as the person ordering whatever it was. Big red flag! And all the other "duly noted" items are becoming red flags. So I check the URL, what exactly was she trying to order? Pornhub.com!

Shit! Then I checked the history. She doesn't know how to erase history yet. Please don't tell her. Here's the history of today's activity:

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Shit! This is not good. I need to address this, but how? I doubt a spanking will do much good. She won't listen to a reasoned argument. I could talk until I'm blue in the face, she'd stare at me with glazed eyes and absorb nothing. There are many issues here as well. In addition to her looking up porn she also used my laptop without permission, lied, went into my bedroom when she's not allowed to, subjected the computer to infection by viruses and worms and stuff. I'm not sure how to proceed, but I think I need to calm down, cool off, and gather my wits about me before I confront her. 

Suggestions are welcome. 

The college adventure begins: First Impressions

• Course text books are expensive. And heavy!
  
• Next week is my 47th birthday. 47 year old ladies are much older than most college freshmen.
• There are a lot of college freshmen in these classes.
• I'm really out of shape. Even though the parking lot isn't very far from the classroom building I still need to go slow, and am a bit short of breath when I get there.
• It feels great to be back in the classroom again! I love school.
• It does not, however, feel so great to try to squeeze my ample circumference into those one-piece torture devices known as desks. 
• There appear to be a lot of female psychology majors. 
• I'm glad I am not trolling for boyfriend or husband material at this college.
• This school has a large education department, and a lot of women go into the field of education. There are a lot of girls here. 
• Young adults can be very irritating, especially when they congregate.
• The internet has brought a lot of changes to the college experience.
• This school's web feature for students and teachers is probably very helpful for instruction and communication between students and professors. Its operation , however, is not intuitively obvious to me.
• Even my name seems old. It is an old name (Doris), but in a class with Revis, Jalessa, Akea, Prestasia, Rashunda, and a slew of Brittanys it just seems really old. 
• I am not physically strong enough to attend college. That won't stop me, but it's going to be tough.

Four of my classes met today, the other two meet tomorrow. My major is psychology with an emphasis on counseling. I am seeking a second degree, my first is a BA in sociology which I earned in 1986. A lot has changed in 22 years. Most of my general education credits have transferred, but I need to take this basic English class which Lander calls Writing and Inquiry II, writing for the disciplines. I may have discussed this previously. Anyway, this English 102 course is a prerequisite for almost every other course in the whole university. The only thing I'm able to take now is lower level beginning classes. This is where all these freshmen show up. 

I have two classes that are at the 200 level. One met today, the other meets tomorrow. There are fewer freshmen in those classes. The Developmental Psychology class I had today was good. It's going to be meaty. I have a lot to remember.

Overall I had a good day. I'm excited about being in school again. It has been a very busy day and I went to bed later than I should have last night. I'm very tired. 

Goodnight

Meanwhile, back in Javaland...

I couldn't resist the LOLcats. 

(the cat is the most interesting part of this whole post. the rest is rambling drivel with much boring detail about my activities of the last couple of days. I recommend you skip it.)

I have been doing stuff since my last post. I've been thinking of you, thinking about telling you stuff. Interesting things come to me as I'm going about my day, things I want to tell you, things I think you'll appreciate. Occasionally I can remember them once I sit here to write. 

Let's start with yesterday. Friday. No, let's start with Thursday evening because that gives the background info for Friday. We'll do Thursday evening, then Friday, then go back to Thursday morning, 'cause that's the way I want to tell it. My blog, my rules. ;)

Thursday evening I went to college town to bring Light home for the weekend. Right now our vehicles are in a sad state of disrepair. Have I mentioned that the van (Big Bertha) has transmission issues? Ugh. We need to do a cost analysis to decide whether to fix her, trade her in as-is, drive her into the river, or begin living in her. Manny, my beloved F150 pick-up truck, has some issues. He always has issues. He's a very butch queen, really. Very high  maintenance. His battery has reached a state of exhaustion rendering him unable to get it up, so to speak. So there he sits, decorating our driveway. 

(Seems my ADD is running rampant today. You know, the ADD that my psychiatrist says I don't have. My brain is telling rambling stories worse than usual.) So, we are not comfortable taking either vehicle out of town. We rented a little Toyota something-or-other from our neighborhood Enterprise franchise. I picked it up around 4:00 Thursday afternoon and headed up to college town to get Light. I was so sleepy! It was tough to stay awake to make that drive. But I did, and rested a while in her dorm until she was ready to go. We got home safely, though I was still very tired. 

Light came home for the weekend to get her wisdom teeth removed. The closest oral surgeon who participates with our insurance is in Augusta, GA, an hour and a half south of here. That's the other reason we rented the little car, to drive down there and back again. We shot out of town Friday morning at 9:30-ish for her 11:15 appointment with the oral surgeon. Making good time, we got there with 15 minutes to spare. This is significant because the interstate that runs through Augusta is currently undergoing extensive renovation. Some days some exits are open, other days they are blocked. It's a crap shoot even for the folks who live around there. Augusta has never made much sense to me, navigationally. I'm usually pretty good with directions, can get around fairly well in new places. Augusta, GA, Athens, GA, and Charlotte NC are cities within a few hours driving distance that befuddle me. So I was quite proud of myself for getting to the surgeon's office in time. 

The waiting room was HOT. I survived anyway. Light is cold natured, while I am hot natured. The poor child's hands and feet are perpetually cold. I don't know how she does it. I sat in the waiting room for however long. Didn't really pay attention to the time. Eventually Light was finished, so we got in the car and came home. Poor kid was in a fog. She had her top two wisdom teeth removed. Thanksgiving of '07 she had the bottom wisdom teeth removed. Hopefully she's now finished having wisdom teeth removed. Rumor has it that she only had 4. I hope that is the case. 

And I was so sleepy on the way back to Greenwood! Did OK. Got back to town and had to take Light's prescriptions to the pharmacy. Also swung by (way out of the way) the family practice office to pick up Sproing's Ritalin prescription. He didn't have any Ritalin at school yesterday. His teacher is a saint. So I got the scripts to the pharmacy, topped off the gas tank (a Toyota Whatever-that-was has a MUCH smaller gas tank than our '00 Chevy 3500 passenger van.). Then I met Superman at the rental car place. I returned the car less than 24 hours after I picked it up, so incurred the one day rental charge instead of the two day. We planned it out carefully, and I'm so glad it went as planned. That's a good day. 

Came back home, crawled into my bed beside Light who was sleeping under a pile of quilts on her Daddy's side of the bed, and we both napped. I was so tired! She was so sore and sick! Poor kid had the upset stomach reaction to the knock-out juice they gave her. She also swallowed a lot of blood from the incisions in her gums. Blood typically doesn't sit well on the stomach. She had a fit of vomiting late last night. I felt so bad for her, but unfortunately there wasn't really anything I could do but sympathize. She went to bed around 1:00 and I think she slept through til morning. She feels much better today, though is taking her Percocet. Perhaps that's why she feels better.

Now, back to Thursday morning. That's when Lander scheduled the New and Transfer Student Orientation. I got the flyer, which said something about talking to your advisor (did that already), registering for classes (did that already), taking a tour of campus (did that already), and getting your parking pass and ID. I hadn't done the latter, but figured I'd do that while everyone else was in the orientation meeting so I would miss the long lines. I'm smart. I think I made a good choice skipping orientation. Indeed I was finally able to get my ID and parking pass. The bureaucratic requirements holding things up were fulfilled somehow. I think it was magic, or perhaps a fairy godmother. I did something, followed some vague directions sent to me in an email from some lady in financial aid. I didn't understand it exactly, though I think it had to do with officially accepting my financial aid package, which I know I already did. Perhaps something changed with the package. Seems they've given me even more money to work with. Not necessarily a good thing, as it's all student loan and I have to pay it back. Really I'd much rather have free money that I don't have to give back. Wouldn't you?

I mentioned that I've been tired. Did I tell you I saw the doctor a couple of weeks ago? I asked him to check my hemoglobin. I suspect low iron. The doctor jumped on that suggestion and ordered a complete blood work up. Well this week I received the results of the blood tests. No, I'm not pregnant. (did I frighten you?) But my iron levels are indeed low. He has prescribed an iron supplement, once a day every day, and he wants to check my iron level again in 8 weeks. My cholesterol numbers are beautiful despite my diet and lifestyle. Good genes, you know. My blood sugar, however, is slightly elevated. He prescribes a weight loss diet and moderate exercise, of course. He prescribes that nearly every time I see him. I am taking the iron tablets, and I only had candy bars for a meal twice this week. *sigh*

Classes begin Monday. I have an 8:00 class on Monday, Wednesday and Friday. That was the only unit of that course still open when I registered. My first class on Tuesdays and Thursdays begins at 9:30. I wish I had bought my books this week, but I didn't have the chance. I can get a book voucher from financial aid to pay for my books. That will charge the books to my loan. The loan details didn't get cleared up until Thursday, and I had all the other business with Light and her teeth of wisdom to handle Thursday afternoon and Friday. I will investigate the matter of procuring my textbooks Monday afternoon when my classes are over.