I'm so sick of this sh!t

I'm depressed. Again. Do you really want to read this drivel? It's not pretty. It's nothing new, either. Same old boring shit.

The summer school program Sproing was in ended on Friday. The grand finale was a field trip to the big amusement park along the South/North Carolina border. The little snot behaved so poorly that he wasn't able to go. After nearly losing his chance to go earlier in the week, by Friday morning the show was go. However, while waiting to board the buses, he kept getting out of hand and wasn't able to keep it together, so the director had to call Superman to come get him. Of course it broke the little guy's heart, but he did it to himself. My heart was broken, too, both for him and because of him. I don't know what else I can do.

Oh, I'm sure there are some "do" things we could try. That's not the point. I don't know if I have anything left to give. I'm broken.

I want to run away. I know that one can't run away from problems, because the problems are integral to the person. The most damnable thing about being by myself is that I have to have me for company.

I shooed Superman out of the room an hour ago. I am not fit company. I was about to scratch his eyeballs out, and he didn't even do anything. His presence irritates me. I gave Sproing the evil eye earlier for simply entering the room.

I hate this room. I hate this house. I hate this town, this state. Although I like being back in college, this particular college grates on my nerves.

I am dying inside.

Educational Travesty

My online economics class has been discussing the issue of immigration and illegal immigration this week. For reference, the instructions are thus:

Please address the following issues in your original posting:

1. Summarize at least one positive economic impact of immigration.

2. Summarize at least one negative economic impact of immigration.

3. Discuss the potential impacts of immigration on poverty levels in the United States. Will immigration impact certain demographic groups in the United States more than others? Explain.

I posted my bit Monday evening. We're supposed to check back, and to read through the other entries and respond if we have something to add. It's supposed to be a discussion, you know.

Well, there are some things I just can't respond to. I present two examples. The first is from one of the students, the second is from another student in reply to the first. (WARNING: painful abuse of the English language)

1. One positive economic impact of immigration has had is that immigrates have boast store sales when they buy items and this helps the economy because it produces more money for it.
2. One negative economic impact of immigration has had is that immigrates are doing jobs that very low wages and because this many Americans that a unemployed cannot get this jobs because they would have to be paid minimum wage something which employers do not have to worry about illegal immigrates. Also, another negative economic impact of immigration is that more and more of them are using public resources such as schools and more immigrates are being arrested leaving many Americans to pay more taxes.
3. I believe that immigrates will impact the poverty line because they would work jobs for lesser pay than minimum wage. This would make employers more hesitant to employ Americans workers. And because of this more people who were born in American and also without high school diploma have no options for actual work and will live off of welfare.

I totally agree with number because at my job we sell more shoes an other sports equipment to immigrants then we do anybody else.They help us meet our sell goals a lot.

I can't respond to this. I can barely guess at what they mean. This is wrong on so many levels. Of course what I'd like to say (especially today, as I'm in a pissy mood) goes along the lines of "Get a F**king Clue! Don't torture me with this mangled mess. Learn how to speak, how to read, how to write." Superman wondered if they are able to understand the textbook at all. This is the book that's full of rambling obscure explanations.

Bless their pea-pickin' hearts, I suppose they mean well. I guess I should be grateful that they are in school and trying to learn. It amazes me, though, that these kids got into college in the first place. Or that they graduated high school. I have serious doubts about the quality of education in Sout' Caroliner.

And perhaps I'm being too judgmental. I can be an obnoxious intellectual snob sometimes. But really, this?

Today's word

expatiate

PRONUNCIATION:

(ek-SPAY-shee-ayt)

MEANING:

verb intr.
1. To speak or write at length.
2. To move about freely.

ETYMOLOGY:

From Latin exspatiatus, past participle of exspatiari (to wander or digress), from ex- (out) + spatiari (to walk about), from spatium (space).

Boy, does this describe me or what? Especially the first definition. I like the Latin exspatiari - to wander or digress. That is so me!

Next in line

I had to get that hairy-backed NASCAR fan off the top of my blog. I like this one much better. I have always liked glass blocks. Wouldn't it be nice to have a glass block shower like this?

I had an exam in statistics last week. We got the grades Monday. I got 100%! I'm thrilled. Then we started something new and I'm all kinds of confused. I can do the calculations, but the logic of it all has my brain in a strain. The answers sound something like "I reject your reality and substitute my own." Replace "reality" with "hypothesis" and that's what it is. The prof keeps saying that if the calculations indicate that what we've observed is very, very rare, then we need to reject that reality. It brings to mind the infinite improbability drive from Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, and I think "of course this will happen!"

Interesting happenings with the in-laws: I mentioned recently that the sister-in-law (SIL) got married. She was in a loveless, lifeless marriage to The Lump for almost 20 years. Superman and I wondered, even before their wedding, why she chose to marry The Lump. I know why she stayed in the marriage, though. She, like the rest of Superman's family, is very religious. They don't "believe" in divorce. Well, SIL lived with The Lump for as long as she could stand it. Her mid-life review broke her out of that trap. I hope her new husband will be as wonderful as he seems. He really does seem like a super nice fella. And he's willing (yea, eager) to have sex with her. That's something The Lump didn't do. SIL is a very sexual woman. I don't know how she stuck it out in that dead marriage for so long.

The Brother-In-Law is eleven years younger than Superman. (SIL is my age, two years younger than Superman.) He went through a series of girlfriends over half a dozen years before settling down with his wife. They've been together for 5 or 6 years, married for 2.5 years (if I recall correctly). Well, this weekend Superman heard from his brother. BIL is leaving her. This is a shocker to me. I learned a lot about them that I didn't know. For the three or so years they lived together before the wedding, they never consummated the relationship. She's a "good Catholic girl" and wouldn't have sex before marriage. She promised it would be different after the wedding. You guessed it - there hasn't been any significant difference. Evidently they hadn't had much sex at all in the entire length of the relationship. I feel sorry for the BIL.

But wait, there's more. Turns out the wife was married previously. BIL knew about it, so no surprise there. What he didn't know until very recently is that she is still married to her first husband! She was going to get the marriage annulled, but never got around to it. When he found out she was still married, he told her, of course, to go ahead with the annulment and they'd get remarried. She has dragged her feet for I don't know how many months, so he finally gave up on her. When she told him this weekend that she will never sleep with him again, he decided that now is a good time to cut and run. At least he doesn't have to go through the expense and aggravation of a divorce. Their marriage is null and void anyway.

They have lived in the Raleigh, NC area. He's moving back to Chattanooga. SIL's new husband lives and works in Chattanooga, too, so she's there. The parents live just over the border in NW Georgia, so now two of their three children live close by. No, we aren't moving to Chattanooga. I've got nothing against the city itself (especially now that they've done so much civic improvement), but I have a LOT against living that close to Superman's familly. (I shouldn't say "never," because as soon as I do, I'll end up living in Chattanooga. Therefore, while the idea doesn't appeal to me, I won't reject the possibility of moving there.)

My dear Father-in-law is scheduled for surgery on August 3rd (I think) to have one of his kidneys removed. He is old, tired, not in good health, and is showing signs of preparing to die. He doesn't expect to survive the surgery. As far as I know, there is no compelling medical evidence to indicate that he won't survive. His spirit, however, is not willing. Superman is understandably concerned. I will keep you updated.

And that's all the gossip from the in-laws. Other than that, I don't have too much to say.

It's a southern thing

This picture is dedicated to my friend-from-the-south who is now up north, Stephen.

It's been real

New jobs blow as Scottish Widows axes 200

SCOTLAND will be dealt another jobs blow today when Lloyds Banking Group announces that up to 250 people are to go from its Scottish Widows arm.

I read this headline and first sentence in the Scotsman today, and phrase "jobs blow" made me do a double-take. Hanging out with you guys has changed my perspective on the world in a lot of little ways.

Hi. I've been away for a little while. It has been a difficult week, and I'm not sure where to start, or what I want to share. I feel emotionally beaten. Raw. A little unwell.

Let's take a glance at the timeline in reverse, or as I am able to recall stuff. Last night the mom of one of Sproing's friends came by and needed to talk to me. Seems the boy stole $60 from her wallet yesterday afternoon. This woman has been nothing but nice to him for the last few weeks as he and her sons have been spending lots of time playing together. I went into his room to ask him about it, and he had $5 on the bed. I took that and demanded the rest of it. He said he'd lost it when he was outside playing hide-and-seek. I told him to find it - NOW! Then I looked over at his table and saw some bills sticking out from under a box. The rest of what he had, $21, was there. I was able to return $26 to her. He had already given her $20, claiming it was from his dad. He and her youngest son had gone to the convenience store and bought chips and candy amounting to approximately $6. Anyway, he still owes her $14, which I will probably give her this afternoon and make him pay me back. Out if his hide, dammit. He's grounded, we took away his PSP, and a few other things the likes of which I can't immediately recall. Oh, he can't go to the skating rink for the rest of summer vacation. Of course he isn't welcome at this woman's house any longer.

And speaking of not allowed at someone's house, let me tell you about Diva. I have no direct proof, but there are allegations that she stole two rings from the home of one of her friends. Diva has not been allowed out of the house very often since we found out she's been having sex with some of the neighbor boys. (Oh, and did I tell you about the obscene text messages Superman and I have received from one of her "boyfriends"? She's used our phones, as she doesn't have one, to talk to this boy. He has sent her a couple of messages, one of which was a picture text of his erect pen!s.) (It wasn't very impressive, as I know you're wondering.) Anyway, the girl went over to play with these friends. I know the girls; they were in Brownie Girl Scouts with Diva a few years ago when I was the troop leader. They are annoying little bitches, as most young adolescent girls are, but as far as I know they aren't criminals like Diva. After she left their house, their older sister (adult, 20-something) noticed that two of her rings and a bottle of nice hand lotion were missing. I searched through Diva's stuff and haven't found anything. I asked her, and -shock!- she doesn't know anything about it.

Last Friday I took Twitch to college. His school is on a quarter system, and summer term started this week. He's living in a two bed/two bath apartment with three other guys. That's the housing system this school has. It's an arrangement with some local apartment complexes, and a fairly good deal, all things considered. Kinda' expensive, but the apartment complexes are nice, well maintained, fairly secure, and the school provides shuttle service to and from school and shopping centers.

He and I have spoken and exchanged texts a few times this week. So far he seems to be enjoying school and home life, getting along well with his roomies, and generally doing well. I'm pleased. I haven't noticed any signs of distress from him, and he probably wouldn't tell me unless it was something really big. He's not very communicative about stuff like that (he's a guy), so I have to listen "between the lines" to catch anything. So far he's either doing really well and/or hiding any problems really well. And I'm OK with that. It's what growing up is about. ["read between the lines" translation from Momspeak: my baby boy is growing up! I'm worried about him, he's three hours away from home, I know his vulnerabilities and am afraid he'll get hurt. I worry that he will lose his temper, or do something stupid (duh, he's a teenage guy), or that his Tourette's tics will become a problem with his roommates, or that the way he talks (screams, laughs, moans) in his sleep will disturb them. And all that other stuff that mothers worry about.]

The process of getting him out of here and into there was ... interesting. He's been so excited about moving there and leaving here. The two are different, you know. He has wanted to leave home to get away from the Demonic Duo for a while now. He says he'll stay at school and not come home during the summers. He will visit during breaks, sometimes, but he doesn't want to live here anymore. I have mixed feelings about that. In a large sense I'm jealous. I want to move away from these rapscallions, too.

Twitch's words and actions are at odds, though. All he's been saying for almost a year is that he wants to move out. However, I went into his room Friday morning before we left and his room looked like he expected to be back next week. From the appearance of his room, it looks as if he hasn't even left. There is still so much junk piled all over the place. His closet isn't as jam-packed as it was, but there are still lots of clothes hanging there. His dresser drawers are messy with stuff. He even left the pillow on his bed. On purpose. He also left his Calvin and Hobbes books. That's the most shocking thing to me. He loves Calvin and Hobbes! He's been quoting C&H for years. He learned to read from C&H, for cryin' out loud! And he left the books on his headboard bookshelf. I asked about that. Light asked about that. He got annoyed with us.

And he was annoyed with us for being in his room. He likes his privacy. How is he going to live with a roommate?? He felt violated, intruded upon, with Light and me in his room. But he's leaving his room; he's moving away. I intend to use his room for other purposes, in addition, of course, to keeping it a place for him to sleep when he is here. I was going to tell him about my plans for his room, but after his emotional reaction to me just sitting on his bed I decided to broach that topic later, after he's had a chance to establish his sense of place in his new digs.

And that's some of what's been occupying my mind for the past week. There's more, of course, but those are the biggies, I think. Right now I need to get dressed and go take my statistics mid-term exam. HOPEFULLY I'll get back here and post again soon. I haven't even had a chance to read my faves, and I miss all my peeps. I keep wondering what's going on in your lives. I've been so caught up in mine that I haven't taken the time to read about yours.

With fond regards,

Java

The ultimate payback for poor consumer service

The band is Sons of Maxwell, the lead singer is Dave Carroll. Hear his tale.

The story is explained in the song lyrics. Here is the short version of his explanation about the song from his website:

United Airlines Song Background (short version)

In the spring of 2008, Sons of Maxwell were traveling to Nebraska for a one-week tour and my Taylor guitar was witnessed being thrown by United Airlines baggage handlers in Chicago. I discovered later that the $3500 guitar was severely damaged. They didn’t deny the experience occurred but for nine months the various people I communicated with put the responsibility for dealing with the damage on everyone other than themselves and finally said they would do nothing to compensate me for my loss. So I promised the last person to finally say “no” to compensation (Ms. Irlweg) that I would write and produce three songs about my experience with United Airlines and make videos for each to be viewed online by anyone in the world. United: Song 1 is the first of those songs. United: Song 2 has been written and video production is underway. United: Song 3 is coming. I promise.

Somewhere, possibly in the longer version of the story*, I read that he hopes to get a million hits on this video in a month. When I logged on to YouTube to get the embedding code, he already had over 700,000. As best as I can determine, the video was just posted earlier this week.

*Go. Read the whole story. It's fascinating.

filler

I want to post. There are all manner of things going through my head these days. I'm quite busy with school. Statistics (or as my father says, "sadistics") is currently being very fun. It's like a big logic puzzle. I get stuff wrong sometimes, but that just adds to the challenge.

Economics, on the other hand, is a pain in the tokus. The book is horrid. Obscure. Here's an example from my reading tonight. The subject is market demand for labor.

In such a case, how is the demand for labor by one firm linked to the demand for labor by all firms? If your common sense suggests that all that must be done is to sum the individual firm demands, then you are right. The procedure is quite simple; for each wage, each individual firm's quantity demanded is added to the quantity demanded by all of the other firms to form the quantity demanded of labor by all firms. In this way, the demand for labor by all employers may be thought of as the summation of the individual demands for labor by the individual employers in the economy.* **

Are there any economic wizards out there? Does anyone reading this post have an easy working knowledge of basic economic principles? I ask because I'd like an informed opinion about this text. Is it really as muddled as it seems, or am I the only one having trouble deciphering it? Also, can anyone direct me to a source that explains this stuff in a way that human beings can easily understand?

Twitch goes off to college on Friday. I'm driving him to Charlotte, NC where he will move into an apartment near the campus. He will have three roommates in a two bedroom apartment, unless he is assigned to a three bedroom apartment, in which case there will be five other roommates. I hope he gets a two bedroom unit. He isn't the easiest guy to live with. "Quirky" doesn't come close to describing him. "Twitchy" does, though. He talks to himself very loudly, carrying on involved conversations with himself. He talks in his sleep, very loudly. And...

Well, this is all about him growing up and learning to survive in the real world. I'm not going to worry (much) about what he might encounter. It will be a powerful learning experience, I'm sure.

I am sleep-deprived. I could write a lot more, but I really need to shut this box down and go to sleep. I have lots of homework to do tomorrow, then a very long day Friday transporting the boy to his new digs. I have stuff to relate about Sproing and Diva, none of it especially surprising and all of it very consistent with the track they have been on now for a very long time. The cats continue to amuse us. Light is enlightening. She cleaned the living room, mopped the floor yesterday. It was very exciting. Right now my butt hurts from sitting here too long, and I'm soooo tired. I don't know when I'll post next; things are typically chaotic. Just know that I want to post more often than I do.

*If you are interested in the bibliographical information, send me an email and I'll be glad to tell you. I'm omitting it here to a) protect the identity of the guilty parties and b) attempt to stay under the search engine radar.

**This passage gets more confusing each time I read it.

I'm not dead yet

I feel almost human again. I felt like crap Thursday, and yesterday I was SOOOOO tired! I took a 4 hour nap, and was tired the rest of the day. The headache weaved in and out of my head all day. I got about 9 hours of sleep last night, and woke up feeling pretty good. I haven't really done anything today, but I'm happy with that.

There will be some sort of grilling of meat and vegetables later in the day. Indigo is vegetarian, so he and Superman went shopping yesterday for some good grillable vegetables. We wouldn't want to starve the poor fella while he's here! It seems that Independence Day is a good day for a chocolate cake, too, don't you agree? I believe I'll go put something like that together. It's possible we might churn some home made ice cream as well. All of this requires that I get off my lazy ass and DO something. Having nothing much better to do anyway, I guess I'll get on it.

Happy Day

Thursday miscellany

It begins to make a bit more sense, especially the statistics. I credit the book and its supplemental teaching tools for most of that success.

On the other hand, economics is quite tedious. I'm not sure what the heck is going on. I have a paper due by 11:00 tonight, and I'm wasting time right now. My heart isn't in it.

Speaking of my heart, I'm sick. I was up until 3 this morning, and only slept five hours. When I got up this morning I did not feel well. My lungs felt slightly icky, and my skin was sensitive. My stomach was off, too. Class didn't start until 10:15, so I went back to bed for an hour. I felt worse when I got up. Superman took the day off today, so he was here to help me get to school. I was so weak and dizzy and achy. I managed to make it through class, but as soon as I got up from my seat, a headache attacked me. I came home, took some Naproxen, and went to bed. I slept for about five more hours. I don't feel as bad as I did. I'm not as achy, but my muscles are weak and shaky. My headache is holding back, waiting to spring again. I can tell it's there, but it isn't bothering me yet.

All of which is very boring to read about.

Indigo is here! He drove all day, arriving at 5:30-ish. He'll stay through the weekend. It is so good to have my dear friend here!

I must get back to my economics homework. TTFN