Learning about blogs

I figured out how to put a picture in the sidebar. This is a picture S took of me over the weekend. He got a new digital camera and has had lots of fun playing with it. He wanted to take pictures of me, and I let him. He is very artistic, makes a nice composition with a photograph. But the pictures he took of me make me look fat. The fact that I am very overweight contributes greatly to the effect. But I like my hair, and I had him take a picture of only that part. If his heart had been in it he'd have taken more hair pics and made it even more artistic, but I think he wanted the whole essence of me, not just small snippets. So this is the only hair shot I got.
S loves me, the whole me. He likes me more than I like myself. That is why he likes the pictures that show face, shoulders, all the chins, blubbery bust, etc. Those photos don't fit the image I hold of myself. When I think about my appearance I see myself at least 100 lbs lighter than what the mirror shows. It is amazing how the human brain works. I can stand at the bathroom sink and brush my hair, take my meds, brush my teeth, wash my hands, and never really see myself in the large mirror that covers the wall above the sink. She's all there, I just don't see her. Because I don't want to see her.