The day started pretty well. I had high hopes. But alas, my hopes were dashed.
Today is the last day of the semester in this school district. Therefore today was a half day. I picked up all my students before 11:45 this afternoon, and was completely finished an hour later. Cool, huh?
Twitch is going on a ski trip this weekend with his scout troop. He needed some ski pants for the excursion. We don't get snow, and we have no significant sloping areas. After work he and I went looking for ski pants at area sporting goods establishments. We found exactly what he needed at the second store. The stock was almost depleted but there was a pair in his size. They were marked down 20%, too, so it only cost $81.32. OUCH! I knew they'd be pricey. With me going out of town next week, my truck in the shop, and a few other unexpected expenses this month I really didn't want to spend $81.32 on a pair of ski pants for the boy that he'll probably never wear again after this weekend. He needs to get a job so he can pay for this kind of thing himself. The trip cost $110, plus $20 for meals on the road to and from the mountain. He needs to make his own money for stuff like this. He'll be 17 next month. It is time.
But that, while unpleasant, isn't what shot my afternoon to hell. No, it was the other son,
Sproing. I am feeling very uncharitable toward that imp today. Allow me to elaborate.
Sproing has been having some trouble at the after school day care. He refuses to cooperate, won't do the simple things he is asked to do, makes a big mess or a big fuss or both and refuses to clean up after himself. He's belligerent and defiant. That's bad enough, but these gals can handle that pretty well. No, it gets worse.
Of late he's also been screaming insults, including profanities, at the ladies who work with him. There is one young lady in the after school classroom and another woman who is the center director, both of whom have been working with him on his behavior. They tell me he has broken two chairs in the lunch room area, throws his book bag around the room if he's mad. He has been lying to the director about his homework, saying he doesn't have any when in fact he does. They have a homework time at the center. All the kids have at least a little bit of homework Monday through Thursday. I think it's school policy, maybe even district wide. I dunno, but he always has at least a little bit of homework. He refuses to do it and lies about it.
As if that weren't enough, he has begun to get physical with these gals. He has hit and kicked the classroom worker, and has scratched the director. The guy who is the director's boss called me yesterday to come get him because he was being so dangerous and disruptive. Yesterday he ran out of the building toward the parking lot, trying to, I don't know, escape. The director told him he couldn't do that, no sir! So he did it again. Today he threw a pair of scissors at the classroom lady, and punched the director in the stomach. Twice. Yesterday he spilled a glass of milk on the table at snack time. On purpose, of course. When told to clean it up, he took the paper towels and threw them on the floor. The lady persisted with her instruction and direction, and he finally got it cleaned up, but it took him half an hour.
There are a few other kids at the center. There are probably 6-8 other children in the after school group. When the workers are having to put so much energy into Sproing they of course aren't able to focus on anyone else. When the little brat acts like this he ruins the time for all the other kids. And of course he frustrates the workers out of their minds.
Superman and I had a firm talk with the boy last night, and then he got a spanking. Talking doesn't work, though. And the spanking didn't seem to do much, either. Although today when I brought him home I gave him another good spanking. This one relayed a stronger impression, I think, than the one he got yesterday. I had to stop before I got too rough.
I can't even talk to him. I talked yesterday, we went over it all. I asked him questions, he talked to me. He said he'd do better, but he didn't. I wonder if he is able to. The time for talk is over. Done. Dead. Gone. He knows better than this. He is actually a very intelligent little boy. He's almost 10; his birthday is next Thursday, two days after mine. He's intelligent, but belligerent. I don't know what his angle is, but he's got to cut this crap out. The center is about one straw away from throwing him out completely. The way he's behaving, I don't blame them.
Today is Wednesday. The kids are out of school tomorrow and Friday. I've already paid for Sproing and Diva to attend the day care those two days. But I'm not taking the demon child back this week. I have plans, I was counting on them being in the day care so I could accomplish some things. But no, not Sproing. He's got to make a huge fuss and get kicked out.
I wonder if that is his plan. He has told me he doesn't want to go there because they are mean. When asked to elaborate he says they make him pick up his book bag off the floor and hang it up with the other ones. Of course we've talked to him about that. That sort of thing is expected wherever you go. Pretty much everything he has issue with (at least that he's told us) is normal expected accepted standards of behavior.
A couple of years ago he was diagnosed with ADHD and ODD. ODD is Oppositional Defiant Disorder. Years ago when I first heard of ODD I thought "A disorder?? No, that's just a lack of discipline. That indicates bad parenting." Note to the wise: don't ever say anything like that. It'll come back to bite you in the butt. Hard. And NOT in a good way. Well, now Sproing is taking medication for the ADHD, and recently started on Remeron (or however it's spelled) which treats depression and helps him relax to go to sleep. He's always had trouble sleeping. Right now I doubt the effectiveness of both medications.
I have more to say about how I'm handling this, but I'll put that in a separate post.
Please do not give me any advice. I can't handle advice right now. There is a chance that maybe you've been in a situation like this. But I doubt it. Unless you are a recognized expert who has difficult children that you are parenting or have parented on a full time basis, I really don't want your advice right now. However, I will accept all the sympathy I can get!
Moving Along, but Adrift
11 years ago
