PRIDE

Proud to be (associated with) Gay

This is the Pride flag image that Kelly is encouraging bloggers to post this month. He suggests we post the flag and tell our coming out stories.

But what is my coming out story? As far as sexual orientation goes, I'm heterosexual. I did "become gay" in spirit a couple of years ago. I've told some of the story in previous posts, but I'll try to encapsulate the essence.

I used to be a homophobic fundamental Christian. Early in 2006 I met C, who was at the time 17 and just coming out. He was a good friend of my daughter, Light. I met him, got to know him, then came to love him. When he came out to his mother and stepfather they kicked him out of their home. He now lives with us.

As I began to love C, I started questioning the church's position on homosexuality. From mid-spring to late summer of 2006 I did a lot of research, a lot of thinking, and a lot of soul-searching. I came to the conclusion that God made gays, therefore being gay wasn't a sin. That's where it started, and I continue to learn and grow.

Once I realized it's OK to be gay, I became proud of "gay" and got defensive if anyone said or did anything to contradict my new-found reality. Having been in the church for 30 years or so, most of my friends were people who believed as I used to. By autumn of 2006 I was (as gently as possible) telling my friends about my revelation that gay is OK. The message was not well received. As important as faith and spirituality are to me, I couldn't make myself sit through a worship service in the congregation where we are members. None of my old friends from church agreed with my new opinion of homosexuality. At this point these people are my "former friends."

I wanted to meet other gays and lesbians. The only gays I knew were C and his partner S, and they are both still teenagers. I wanted to get to know older, more mature people with broader experience and adult perspectives. I've tried to find them here in Greenwood, South Carolina with very little success. I know they are here, I just can't find them! We got involved with the PFLAG chapter in Greenville, about an hour's drive north of Greenwood. But that city is far enough away that socializing with anyone there is too difficult. (Especially with gas prices as high as they are now!)

Eventually it occured to me that this is the 21st century; I could look online for gay and lesbian contacts. That's how I found this blogging community. I have met so many wonderful men and women through this medium, and everyone has been so open and honest with me. I now understand a vast range of gay life experiences.

I continue to learn, to grow, and to reach out to the gay community. My 5 year goal is to return to school, hopefully to get a Master's degree in some field relating to GLBT issues. I want to devote my time and talents to support homosexuals and eradicate homophobia wherever I can.