S is worried about me. He says I am spending too much time with the blogs and not enough time interacting face-to-face with people. You all are people, aren't you? I know at least most of you are.
He is also worried that I'm going to develop deep vein thrombosis from sitting on my ass too much.
My therapist told me I need to make friends, particularly with people who are intellectually stimulating. I've wanted to meet more people from the glbt community, and there isn't a good place to do that around here, as far as I've been able to tell. I heard a rumor that one of the bars in town has a 'gay night' once a month. Third Tuesday or something. But I'm not all that fascinated with bars. Drinking is fine, but bars … have too many people, are too loud, and the flashing lights disturb me. The point, though, is that I've met some truly wonderful people, many of you glbt and/or supportive. I've been amused and intellectually stimulated. (then there are the eye candy pictures, speaking of stimulating, but that's not the point of this post.) I've been informed. I have written down my thoughts, being forced to organize them and present them in an understandable (I hope) format. All sounds about good to me. Am I really missing something?
Maybe I should take off to Virginia (where I really want to go anyway) and meet face to face with some of my favorite bloggers in that state. I'd love to, really, but transportation, financial, and time issues prevent it. But I have a funny feeling that's not what the therapist had in mind. I know it isn't what S has in mind. He wants me to be engaged with physical beings in my physical community, and not to run away. For going to Virginia right now could be considered running away.
I am a bit of a recluse. Well, maybe more than a little bit of a recluse. Makes it tough to meet new people. I feel very safe in the blogosphere, though. I can have intellectually stimulating interactions with you all and not have to get dressed or comb my hair if I don't want to. Rest assured, I do have to go out in public on a regular basis to do my job, and I dress and groom myself (minimally on the grooming thing, but it's a 'me' thing) for work.
I shop. I go to Wal-Mart, wander up and down the aisles, chose merchandise to purchase, check on merchandise I don't purchase. I also dream about merchandise I'd like to purchase at some point, and (one of my favorites) make fun of ridiculous merchandise I'd never with a million dollars purchase.
Should I be worried? Should S be worried?
5 comments:
I remember the days when I actually would meet 20-30 people who were part of a G & L chat room on AOL. We met in Orlando, Denver, San Diego, and Boston. Many of us were room monitors in the AOL rooms. And many, including myself, worked for Gay.com.
Don't let the cyber world overcome you. You need to have a home base of friends and support.
i guess that depends on what *you* want to do. is being social and being around people something you want to work on?
the thing about therapy, at least for me, is that i was boss and we focused on things that i thought were important, not what my therapist thought was important.
it is, however, important to have people you can count on in real life, more than s and your therapist. getting to know a neighbour is a possibility, if there are any that you might think you like. that'd be a start. maybe take a small class in something like pottery or something you're interested in. it's a good way of meeting people that doens't involve alcohol and meat market atmosphere.
being social has never been really important to me. the important thing to me was bieng able to function in groups of people. it enabled me to get to university and tolerate being around hordes.
dykewife: I don't really want to be around people much. I much prefer being alone. I do, however, want to be able to function in social situations. I'm not at all good with groups, especially groups of people standing around expecting conversation. If groups of people are busy working, that's fine. Parties make me uncomfortable. Some days I can do parties, on bad days I hide.
You give good advice, though.
This little Blogdom of ours is a safe way to interact with real people, socialize, and even meet people. You shouldn't be worried - as long as Blogging doesn't become an excuse to hide away from the rest of the world completely.
Java,
Like with all things moderation is the key. Just don't let the cyber world consume you. I have a friend that spent more time online with friends than he did with his partner, and it started to really effect the relationship.
I feel funny trying to give advice based on just some blog posts. Every time I write something I keep deleting it because I really don't know your situation well enough. Just really keep a balance in your life and don't let the time you spend online start to hurt your relationships with your husband and family.
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