A rant against the quality of education in South Carolina

I have begun the process of applying to our local university. The admissions office sent me an email encouraging me to activate my personal admissions information page. I followed along, clicked links, etc. At one point I was prompted to chose the category that best applied to my situation. There wasn't one specifically for tired old ladies who want to add intellectual challenge and a change of direction to their lives, so this one was the next best thing.
Read carefully.

Transfer Interest Page
You have been studying at another college/university (possibly multiple colleges/universities). You are now interested in pursuing a degree at Lander University. Note: You don't want to loose the time investment at your other institution(s), so don't forget to discuss your credit history with a counselor.

Notice the word I have emphasized. I could be at loose ends, I could loose the chains that bind me, I might even be loosely associated with organized crime. But I don't think I have the power to loose time.
I have been accused of being too picky, being a grammar snob on occasion. It's a family thing. We all do it. I will admit that my spelling isn't always accurate. I try not to be too picky about things like this where it really doesn't matter. But please. This is on the website of a university within the state-wide university system. I expect more from them, even if it is South Carolina. How are we going to improve our reputation if we don't set higher standards of accuracy and good grammar especially within our institutions of higher learning?

Right now my situation has me living here. I'd rather not live in this city, in this state, but for now it is what it is. I strongly desire to go back to school. Lander U is conveniently located. But if I had my druthers, I would rather not matriculate at Lander University.

Mother's Day Rant 2008

I get like this nearly every year. Forewarned is forearmed.

Disclaimer #1
For my mother, my mother-in-law, my stepmother (oops, forgot about her until just now) I have no trouble honoring them on Mother's Day. I do so in a simple, non-complicated, not-commercially-motivated way. Same for my grandmothers, but there aren't any left now, unfortunately. This has everything to do with those whom I mother, not those who are mothers to me.

Disclaimer #2
The opinions expressed in this rant are mine and mine alone, and are in no way a reflection of my feelings toward anyone else and his/her opinions on the topic.

We shall now proceed to the rant

[this bit is mostly preamble to the rant]
I am a mother. This means many things. I gave birth to two children and adopted two children, so there are four children who share my last name and for whom I am legally responsible. More than that, though, I have taken two more young people into my home (non-legally)(which is not to say illegally. big difference!) and I am a surrogate mother for them. Many years ago I was a temporary foster mother for newborn babies awaiting adoption. These are a few of the ways in which the term "mother" applies to me.

I also am a mother in an active sense. I mother. Verb. I tend to mother many people in many situations. Most of the close friends of my children receive some of my mothering. I acted motherly with the students on my bus. I have also done some mothering with many blog friends. Sometimes I mother because it is my nature. My excuse: I'm a mother. It's what we do.

I'm a mother. It's what we do. As a mother and when I mother I want respect. To me, respect means to be nice to me. You (the subject of my mothering efforts) don't need to agree with me. Unless you are my minor child, living in my home and are my legal responsibility, you don't have to listen to me or do what I suggest. If you ignore my advice that is your decision and I (probably) won't take offense. If you'd rather I didn't voice my opinions in a motherly fashion, kindly tell me. I will attempt to honor your request. The key word in this paragraph is "kindly." That's what respect means to me.

I have been told by many people that I am a good mother, that they wish they had had a mother like me, or even that they wish I had been/would be their mother. I am very honored by this.

[this is where it begins to get rant-ish]
My distress comes from those I most actively mother. Maybe it's the daily drudgery, or the familiarity, or that the better they know me the more they see my faults and the less respect they have for me. Whatever the cause, the children (including the adult-aged children) in my home do not show me respect.

The children in my home are the ones who mean the most to me. Well, them plus the one of my own who usually lives away at college. I'll include her in the "means the most to me" category, but she doesn't fit in the "has no respect for me" category. My Light is the light of my life (one of 'em!) and makes me so proud! But I digress.

[here comes the vitriol]
To continue: The youngsters who live here show virtually no respect. Ever. (virtually. some exceptions, though rare) Maybe I shouldn't, but I take this as a personal affront. Rarely do they care about my needs, they blatantly ignore me and often are directly disrespectful. They are rude to each other, inconsiderate, slovenly, destructive, mindless, dense, lazy, greedy and selfish.

Tomorrow is Mother's Day. Some of these children will attempt to be nice to me tomorrow. It rings hollow when on one day of the year they act all loving and thankful to me. If you don't exhibit these qualities every day, or at least make an obvious attempt on a regular and frequent basis, do not come to me with pretty cards and flowers and boxes of chocolate and smile disingenuously to tell me how much you appreciate me! Bullshit! If the only time of the year you can force these lies through your teeth is on Mother's Day, then forget it. I don't want to hear it. I am interested in honesty. What you do speaks louder than what you say. What you do on a typical day means more than what you pretend on one "special" day. If you truly want me to know that you appreciate me and what I do for you, then show me in the way you conduct yourself at home and in your daily life every day. Otherwise, shove it up your ass.

Others of them, I suspect, will completely ignore me and the contributions I make to their lives. In a small way I see this as a sign of my success. I'm doing so well they don't notice what they might otherwise lack. In a larger sense I realize they are ungrateful, shallow, and selfish. I don't expect, neither do I desire lavish displays of appreciation. I would like them to voluntarily and without prompt simply thank me for trying to take care of their physical and emotional needs. This specifically applies to the ones for whom I am a surrogate mother. They are old enough to realize and appreciate my efforts at least a little bit. It is very important, necessary for the honesty of it all, that they do this completely without prompt. S sometimes reads my blog, and if he sees this, it will be his prompt. C'est la vie.

To give them credit, the boyz do occasionally express appreciation. S more often than C. S goes through stages where he's concerned about me and does a pretty good job looking out for me, trying to keep me from frustrating myself more. It isn't easy work! But there are also many times when I feel he is taking me for granted. Love may be a many splendored thing, but it's hard, too.

I know they love me, these children/young adults who live with me. And I love all of them. But if I only see expressions of love on Mother's Day it just makes me mad. I feel even less appreciated if they have to be forced by this "holiday" to make the attempt.

Making my life more difficult by degrees

It's a little thing, but sometimes those little things can cause big annoyances.
Have you noticed that Blogger has redesigned the text verification? It is now even harder to read. This pisses me off.
/rant

:::RANT WARNING:::

I was going to type up some thoughts I've had stewing in my brain about gender conforming vs. gender non-conforming modes. But Mr. Sunshine's latest post triggered an avalanche of passion that I decided to share with you instead. You've been warned.

Ya' know what teachers did with kids in the 60s and 70s? Yea, they smacked 'em down, but there really wasn't as much trouble as there is now. Kids were taught better at home. This is no reflection on your parenting at all, trust me. It's a cultural thing. If a noisy handful of kids are getting away with it, it influences others that are not as willing to start shit. They just join shit in progress. Back in the day parents didn't buy into the psychobable of the parenting "experts" like they do today. They knew misbehavior for what it was, and treated it accordingly. And if Kelly did something wrong on 3rd Street, Mrs. Jones saw it, called Kelly's mother at her home on 5th St., and by the time Kelly got home, there was a switch waiting on him/her.

And the kids those days were outside playing, by and large. They ran, they explored, they discovered many interesting things that they had to THINK about, independent of how some other agency told them they should think. Today kids are staring at alphabet-named screens. You know, LED, HDTV, CRT (though not too many look at CRT screens anymore). The television programming, video games, computer games and MySpace type places - these things teach children what to think. They make sure to avoid teaching children HOW to think. School curriculums from day care and nursery school all the way through high school, and beyond in some instances, reinforce what to think and discourage independent thinking. We are (have?)creating a generation of drones.

So these kids are in classrooms, especially the younger ones just learning not to think, and the kids are restless. They have impulses of creativity and originality but no tools to channel these energies in positive directions. The teachers and administrators discourage positive release of this energy. They want the kids to sit down and swallow everything just as it is presented, no questions asked. Since the kids really don't know why they are so restless and unsatisfied, they "act out." The teachers have been trained not to think for themselves, to believe what the textbook authors and educrats tell them, so they are unprepared for your child's original ideas. Have you seen the crap the teaching colleges teach the teachers? It is concentrated bullshit.

So they medicate the problems. You are looking at this huge fortress of misguided mind control called public education, in an evil axis of alliance with The Media, having unrealistic expectations for your unique child. Plus all the other unique children who have yet to learn how not to think. It’s them against you and your child. In their world, you don’t really count. There is wonderful medication that can put the impulses under control, and the medical field is a willing cohort, especially since there is great wealth to be gained. (Healthcare is a rant for another day)
I could go on, but I’ll stop with this. I have thrown in the towel. The three children I have still in public school are all on (mind control) ADD medications. I don’t have the physical or mental stamina to fight it anymore. I do what I can with the kids when they are at home. But it could and should be done differently.

More ranting about the system, school this time

Yesterday I posted about the bit of trouble I got into when I tried to take S's book bag to him at school. Today my boss stopped me in the lot and stuttered... "I don't need to say any more about yesterday, do I?" Huh? I knew what he was talking about, but didn't know why. I just told him "No, I know I'm supposed to 'do the right thing.'" I continued toward my bus. Thinking. Why would he ask that? Is there more?

So I buzzed him on the two-way. "Did somebody say something else?" He replies "Nothing worth mentioning." Sh!t. That just made me madder. I had calmed down since yesterday, mainly by trying not to think about it. But it came up again. What else? And boss-man isn't forthcoming with details. Probably for the best. But I worried it like a dog with a smelly shoe for half an hour, until work took my mind off of it.

I went into the office after my route. I asked boss-man "Is there something else I should know? Or is there something I already know that I need to be reminded about?"

"No." he says, with his 'everything is fine, just calm down' smile. He's good with that. So we chatted a bit. I (calmly for the most part) explained my dissatisfaction with this rule and the system in general. It helped. Me, anyway. We discussed possible benefits of this rule of not allowing parents to visit the classrooms without the office's stamp of approval. For instance, he says if they make an exception for me to go on the halls, then what's to stop other parents from showing up anytime? Well, for one, I don't know another parent with children in the school who would make the effort to do that! He conceded. (was he humoring me? Maybe) What it comes down to is control. They have it, I don't, so neener-neener on me. And that's the truth-th-th-th. I have no way of winning in any possible way in this dispute.

I did on one previous occasion check in at the office before visiting the teachers. The pinch-faced microencephalon at the reception desk refused to let me out of the office. She called the assistant principal to "take care of me." I never got to see the teachers I needed to see. The a$$ principal told me he'd take care of getting what I needed. (I needed assignments for S who had been suspended by this same a$$ principal the day before, but that's another story and my blood pressure is too high for it now.) He said he'd talk to the teachers and have them all e-mail me with the assignments. That was on a Friday. On Sunday evening I got an email from one teacher. I never ever heard from any of the others. And I know they have my email address because I had been in contact with each of them previously.

-steam comes out the ears-

I ended up apologising to boss-man for getting him mixed up in the middle of this mess. And I thanked him greatly for running interference. I told him I'm very glad he's buffering these messages from the school, and he said "yes, you are!" Again, Sh!t. What I don't know helps keep me out of trouble, I suppose. He's helping prevent me from saying something I'd regret to someone I shouldn't talk to right now. Boss-man is a good guy, overall. Irritating sometimes, but generally beneficial.

A rant about the local public high school

Today I went to the high school to deliver S's book bag to him. ( He is a teenage boy, ergo he is stupid. He left his book bag in the car. ) I know who his teachers are, where their classrooms are, and when he is in those classes. I had to start work soon, and the bus lot is beside the high school, right next to the building where S was in class. So I went in, gave the bag to him. On my way out, a small minded troll lady teacher thing stopped me to tell me I need to check in with the front office whenever I go to the school. She recognised me as a bus driver, and knows I have children in the school.

When I explained that I was there just to give something to the boy, she said "nevertheless, if you don't check in, you are considered to be tresspassing." Hell, lady, I work here! You know who I am! I am here for the benefit of my student! What kind of tight-assed stupid-rule-following bitch are you?

So rather than saying "well, then, go get the resource officer to arrest me," I thanked her very much (with my most sarcastic smile) and went to work. Steaming.

yada, yada, the rest of the work day, etc.

So when I got back after driving my route, I went to see my boss about some bus issues (which may show up in another post ). We got those things squared away for now, and then he says he got a call from the high school principal today. Fuck a duck. That bitch. I have tried to have meetings with this bitch a few times in the last three years. Never has she been available to meet with me. My daughter Light tried to interview her for the school newspaper last year, and the bitch wouldn't give her five minutes. Now, today I walk into the school to help out my boy, and she's all over my ass. (and not in a good way AT ALL)

My boss is a cool fella, though. He knows my intentions, he knows how I feel about bull shit rules. He knows that he would be hurting if I left him. He said all the right things, trying to assuage me. He is very diplomatic that way. So I'll let the system fuck me over. Again. And I will try to make it through Twitch's high school career, then try to find some alternative schooling for the two younger ones.