Meh

It's like this... nuthin'. I got nuthin' going on, nothing interesting to say.

My brain is full of cotton fluff. Nothing interests me, my primary motivation is to stay out of the way of the people in this house. Except maybe Superman. He's nice. Everyone else is annoying at the very least.

Sproing got himself suspended from school for mouthing off to an administrator and refusing to cooperate. Typical Sproingish behavior, I see it all the time. The assistant principal was not amused. Now Sproing is home until next Wednesday and I am not amused. I can't talk to him. When I try he gets very angry and won't listen.

Diva came home from school in tears today. The usual suspects are picking on her again. They're threatening to jump her... after graduation. She's repeating the 10th grade, and if she passes all her classes this year and next she will be eligible to graduate in June of 2016. So, over a year and a half from now she might get jumped by these girls who don't like her. But to her it is a big thing, and I can't dismiss her concerns. But she won't tell me who these girls are and she refuses to inform the authorities at school. So what the hell am I supposed to do about it? All I did today was make sympathetic noises. Really, it's all she allows me to do.

I'm not a good mother anymore. I think I used to be, to the older children who were good at behaving themselves. To the younger ones when they were real young. I have no idea what to do with them now. I've lost most of the respect they ever had for me. I feel used. This feeling of being used is probably typical of parents of teens. No matter, is sucks.

So my only purpose in life right now is to love my husband. I can do that. I enjoy loving my husband. He's a great guy. Not perfect, of course, and I try to ignore his imperfections. I can live with that. I'm supposed to have purpose as a mother, but my children won't let me. Whatever. I just wish they wouldn't argue with me. It hurts.

I don't post here very often anymore. There isn't much to say that doesn't sound pitiful. But I figured I'd check in, let you know that I'm still alive and I plan to stay that way.