stray dogs and sex education

Diva and Sproing have recently been engaged with a stray dog that showed up over the weekend. He is a medium size black dog who looks like a cross between a Labrador and a basset hound. Yes, strange. The kids want to keep him closed up in our garage. I want the dog to go away. He is a sweet dog and can follow simple commands. He obviously belongs to somebody.

The children also like to play with the neighbor’s dog. This dog, Gabby, lives behind us. Her fenced yard backs against our back yard. Diva and Sproing have figured out how to “accidentally” let Gabby out of her yard. They do this, and then play with her. She’s a playful pup and enjoys the attention.

I was working in the kitchen the other afternoon and the kids were hanging around. We started discussing the black dog. I told them to leave him alone, don’t pay him a lot of attention and don’t feed him! They said he likes to play with Gabby. He likes climbing up on Gabby. I asked for more detail, and Diva said “He’s humping.” Ah, it all makes sense now. Black dog won’t leave soon, not of his own free will.

This of course led to an interesting discussion. I explained that some female animals go into heat when their bodies are ready to make babies. They give off a smell that attracts the male and makes him want to mate with her. Keep it simple but informative, Mom.

This story wouldn’t be blog worthy if it stopped here. No, Diva had another question. Isn’t it wonderful when youngsters are inquisitive? Mom, she says, do people do that too? No, women don’t go into heat. Sex and reproduction work differently in people. I explained that for people, sex is also a way to show love and connect emotionally. But you don’t do that, Mom! Sproing piped up to say we had to do it in order to have Light and Twitch. Ok, Diva conceded that we probably had sex twice. OMG it was all I could do to keep from laughing!

But wait! There’s more! Diva understands that of course Daddy can’t have sex anymore because he had that operation. (squelch snort) Um, that operation just disconnects the tube that carries the sperm that fertilizes the egg in a woman’s body. It doesn’t affect a man’s ability to have sex. She wasn’t so sure. I suspect she still thinks her Daddy can’t have sex. (NOT the way it works honeychile!) Diva wants a baby sister (DEAR GOD NO!!) but since Daddy can’t have sex anymore, that won’t happen.

I got a distinct impression from this conversation with Sproing and Diva: there is obviously no reason for their Mom and Daddy to have sex.

Do you ever wish you were a fly on the wall in this house?