I do NOT like this much drama in my life! Now with update!

If you've read this blog for any length of time, you know that my youngest daughter Diva and I do not get along. And I think I've said here that she doesn't want to be with us. Well, right now she's not. She ran away from home yesterday. We think she's with a friend of hers, and the friend's older sister came by this morning to discuss things with us. The older sister is a great little lady. Diva's friend seems to be about as fucked up as Diva is. The friend turned 18 years old last week so she thinks there are no rules. Diva has always worked on the belief that rules don't apply to her.

I am not at all surprised that she ran away. In a yelling match last week she told me she had all her stuff packed and ready to go. I didn't take her too seriously at the time, and really don't know what I could have done about it anyway. She has rejected our authority and I don't know how to change that. Her friend's big sister (let's call her Big Sis) recommended that we beat Diva. I don't feel right about doing that, though it might be what's necessary. I won't do it. She's stronger than me and will beat me if I try. I know. We've had a couple of physical altercations already and I don't want to do that again. Am I afraid of her? Physically, yes.

I didn't sleep well last night. I'm worried about the child. I love her and care what happens to her. I don't particularly like her right now, though there are times when she's quite pleasant to be with. I don't think she ought to live with us, but we haven't found any safe place to house her. I contacted a local children's home last week about taking her, but especially now that she's run away I think she's too big a risk for them to take. I have a couple of other leads, one of which I just emailed. The other is a military school I just found out about. Their homepage is opened in another tab right now.

And right now my chest kind of hurts. It's a dull ambiguous ache high in the middle of my chest. Also, there is not enough chocolate in this house.

Diva

This picture was taken two years ago, but she still looks about the same. Her hair is different now. She's wearing a wig, long straight black hair with bangs. Her own hair is "natural" (not straightened or permed) and fairly short.

That's about all I have now. I'll update if there is anything new to add.

UPDATE:
She came home on her own tonight (Sunday night) around 11:30. She's here, but very unhappy about it. We aren't sure what we're going to do next.